The Bubble

Time Subtitle
8s [captivating instrumental music playing]
42s [music continues]
55s [loud growl]
59s [man 1] Gunther, Bola,
1:01 thank you for joining us here in our bubble.
1:04 As the producer on this movie, here's what I expect from you.
1:08 -Actors are animals. -[woman scoffs]
1:11 You are animal handlers.
1:14 Sometimes, they wanna play with you. Sometimes, they'll rip your balls off.
1:19 Don't listen to anything they say. They're liars.
1:22 They literally lie for a living. That's their literal job, yeah?
1:26 Don't party with them.
1:28 Don't tire them out.
1:30 Don't fuck them.
1:32 I won't.
1:33 Always tell them they're fantastic in the movie.
1:38 They're very insecure people. They need constant praise.
1:41 Make them feel good. Don't tire them out. Don't fuck them.
1:44 Don't fuck them.
1:45 -[man 1] That's it. -That's it.
1:47 Any questions?
1:48 Um Yeah, like, what if we become proper friends?
1:51 -You won't. -[man 2] No?
1:53 No.
1:54 What if they confide in you
1:55 and tell you something they've not told anybody else?
1:58 Call me, tell me what they said.
2:00 -What if they say, "Don't tell Gavin"? -[Gavin] No!
2:03 -No. -This is the bubble.
2:05 The sanctuary!
2:07 It's the only place they're safe! That's why you're not wearing masks.
2:11 Don't you get it?
2:14 -[woman] Hi! -Hey! [laughs]
2:15 -[woman laughing] How are you? -So good to see you!
2:18 -Uh -Oh
2:19 -Well, imagine -[woman] Okay, yes.
2:21 -Fake hug. -[man] Oh, wow. You look fantastic!
2:23 [woman] Thanks. Been exercising a lot. It's the only thing keeping me sane.
2:27 Well, you look sane and gorgeous, and, uh
2:30 -What do you think about Cliff Beasts 6? -I can't leave my boyfriend right now.
2:34 He is very neurotic, and this whole time is just very triggering for him.
2:37 Huh. Okay. What if you brought him?
2:40 -He won't travel. -Because of the pandemic?
2:42 No, he just won't fly. He also refuses to get a job.
2:45 I have a lot of clients working in bubbles right now, and they're having a blast.
2:49 It won't be comfortable working with them.
2:52 They hate me for not doing Cliff Beasts 5. I can't bubble with them for three months.
2:56 I'm gonna level with you.
2:58 You need a rebound after your last film, Jerusalem Rising.
3:01 -Mm-hmm. -You saw the reviews.
3:02 -I never read my reviews. -Hang on a sec.
3:04 -Can you not read those? -Just listen, okay?
3:07 "Jerusalem Rising manages to offend both Palestinians and Jews."
3:11 That's one review. And it was the script. It wasn't my fault.
3:15 When Cats bombed, they didn't blame Andrew Lloyd Webber.
3:18 They just said, "Judi Dench fucked Cats."
3:20 Okay, but you were the one who told me
3:22 I could play half-Israeli and half-Palestinian when I'm neither.
3:26 [in ambiguous accent] I know you've been fighting for thousands of years,
3:30 but tonight, we must join forces to fight the aliens.
3:38 [in normal accent] Is my career dead?
3:41 Not if you make this movie.
3:43 And it's safe?
3:44 The safest place in the world right now is a film set.
3:49 The script is actually good?
3:50 It made me cry.
3:52 [instrumental music playing on speakers]
3:58 Oh, you're making the face like you're gonna say yes.
4:00 Oh, my God, Josh is gonna have a full nervous breakdown.
4:03 I can do this, right?
4:04 I'll keep my head down, not get pulled into the drama,
4:07 and just do my job and get out.
4:10 All right. Okay, let's do it. Yeah, put me in the bubble.
4:14 [pleasant music playing]
4:24 [cell phone ringing]
4:26 -[Carol] Hi! -[man 2] Carol. What's up, movie star?
4:29 This is so crazy. You sure you're gonna be okay?
4:31 Yeah, I mean, I guess I'm just worried about catching the virus, but
4:35 Well, just call me regularly.
4:37 Actually, I just heard that veterinarians are gonna start treating people,
4:41 so that'll help.
4:42 Yeah, and it's only three months. Three months! We can do this!
4:45 Oh, wait! Somebody wants to say hi!
4:47 Okay.
4:48 Look who it is!
4:50 I miss you so much, Mommy.
4:52 Aw. I'm not your mommy yet, Leila,
4:53 but I will be your stepmom one day. It'll be the best!
4:56 -Daddy said you left us for dead. -Oh, what?
4:59 -[laughs] Don't forget about us! Bye! -Bye!
5:11 -[Carol] Hey! Nice to meet you! -Hiya! I'm Pippa, production coordinator.
5:14 Oh. Shall we? [chuckles] Welcome to Clifton House.
5:17 -[Carol] This is amazing. -[Pippa] I know, right?
5:22 -Carol, we're so excited you're here! -[Carol] I'm so excited to get started!
5:26 -[Gavin] Wow! You look great. -[Carol] Oh, thank you.
5:29 -Now, you just have to do a COVID test. -[Carol] Okay.
5:32 -[Gunther] I'm such a big fan. -[Carol] Thank you. [chuckles]
5:34 [Gunther] And in your nose. Okay.
5:37 -[Carol] Mm. -[Gunther] Ready? One hundred.
5:40 Ninety-nine.
5:41 -Ninety-eight. -Uh
5:43 -I'm only joking. -Oh!
5:45 -[chuckling] Oh, my God! You're the worst! -[Gunther] See you in a bit. Bye, friend.
5:48 [Carol] Bye. Whoo! Yeah.
5:50 Um, so how does the quarantining work?
5:52 It's a quick 14 days. We pamper you.
5:55 Wait till you see what we've done to your room.
5:57 -[Pippa] You have the best room by far. -[Carol] I love that.
6:00 -Ah! Bola! -[Bola] Hello.
6:02 This is Bola, our wellness specialist. Bola, how would you describe yourself?
6:06 Uh, well, due to safety, we don't have a lot of staff, so I get to do everything.
6:11 Which means if you need a personal trainer, Bola.
6:14 If you need a yoga teacher, Bola.
6:16 If you need a ping-pong opponent, Bola. If you need a masseuse?
6:20 -[Carol] Bola! -[Bola] That's it, baby girl.
6:22 [man] We allowed to smoke weed in the room? I forgot to bring my edibles.
6:26 [Carol] Oh, my God! Howie, how are you?
6:28 -[Howie] Carol, come here, my love! -[man 1] Stop! That's it. Stop it!
6:31 -[man 2] Off you go. -[Howie] What the fuck is going on?
6:34 -Brother, help me! -[Carol] Howie?
6:35 Give it two weeks, and you'll have all the hugs you need.
6:39 [enchanting music playing]
6:41 [Bola] Reception area.
6:43 [Carol sighs] Now, this is beautiful.
6:45 [Bola] Of course! Top of the line for top-of-the-line talent.
6:48 [Carol chuckles]
6:50 [Bola] There you are.
6:51 [Carol gasps] This is nice!
6:54 [Bola] Good. See you in two weeks.
6:57 -[Carol] Oh. -[door locks]
6:59 [dramatic orchestral music playing]
7:04 -[vibrator buzzing] -[Carol moaning]
7:08 [cheers and applause on TV]
7:10 She loves you! And you're the prime minister!
7:13 [panting]
7:14 [screams]
7:16 [grunts angrily]
7:17 Am I your bitch now?
7:19 That's what you get for fucking with her mission!
7:22 [grunting]
7:27 [groans] This is too much for anyone to take!
7:31 [screaming and crying]
7:35 [rhythmic knock on door, door opens]
7:38 Hey, Carol Cobb.
7:40 Your quarantine is over. [chuckles]
7:42 Uh, the cocktail party starts in one hour, okay?
7:45 [sniffs]
7:47 Please shower before you come.
7:49 It stinks in here.
7:52 -Jesus Christ. -[door closes]
7:54 ["You Know I'm No Good" by Amy Winehouse playing]
7:56 -[indistinct chatter] - Meet you downstairs
7:58 In the bar and hurt
8:01 Your rolled-up sleeves And your skull T-shirt
8:05 You say
8:06 -This is so exciting. -[man] Hmm.
8:09 It's like my movie posters have come to life.
8:13 Yeah, you will soon learn to hate these people.
8:16 You abandoned us.
8:18 I am mad at you. Back away.
8:21 I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
8:24 -Are you? -[Carol] I am.
8:25 I should have done the movie. I shouldn't have bailed.
8:28 I'm an idiot.
8:31 I missed you so much. I did.
8:32 -You did? -Yeah.
8:34 Sorry. Had to get that off my chest.
8:36 Yeah, give it to me. [chuckles]
8:38 And I really liked you in Jerusalem Rising.
8:42 -[woman] Yeah. -Really?
8:43 That means so much coming from you.
8:46 And I think that all of the critics around the world are wrong.
8:51 Oh, not everyone.
8:53 Four percent on Rotten Tomatoes. [scoffs]
8:55 It doesn't really go lower.
8:58 So I need cool, documentary-style footage.
9:01 If the actors ask for air, give them air, but then strike and get what we need.
9:06 I want you to be a fly on the wall,
9:08 but also up their arse.
9:10 -Now, fuck off, Lee. -My name is Scott, actually.
9:13 -I don't care. -Okay.
9:15 You a big Cliff Beasts fan?
9:17 No, but I saw the trailer for the second one. It was so cool!
9:21 -Oh. -[Scott] Hey!
9:23 Hi, y'all!
9:24 Excited for Cliff Beasts?
9:26 [whispers] Is this the movie?
9:28 [Scott hesitates] What?
9:29 Are we shooting right now?
9:31 No, it's just behind-the-scenes stuff.
9:34 Just say, like, a sentence about why you're excited?
9:36 I'm sorry. You're gonna have to talk to my mom if you wanna talk to me.
9:40 Oh, all right.
9:41 -It's nice meeting you. -Okay, you too.
9:45 -[woman] Dieter! Hi! -Hi.
9:48 Lauren. Um
9:49 I just wanted to tell you how incredible you were in Hunger Strike.
9:56 Your performance was
9:58 I mean, I think about it all the time. Just fearless and a total triumph.
10:03 Um Congratulations.
10:06 I don't watch my own shit. Never watch your own shit.
10:08 You just wipe, you flush, and you move on.
10:10 Right. Well, anyway, I just wanted to let you know that it really stuck with me,
10:15 and it was very powerful. Just
10:17 Yeah. Where's your husband?
10:20 My husband? We got divorced.
10:22 Of course.
10:23 Mm-hmm. Uh--
10:24 [Dieter] I'm sorry.
10:26 No worries. It's We're fine.
10:28 We are, uh totally fine.
10:31 We have gone through a lot, and we are coming out on the other side.
10:36 Right.
10:37 Our main priority is our 16-year-old son,
10:40 who we just adopted right before the divorce.
10:44 Listen, I'm sorry, I'm trying to care, but it's hard.
10:47 Gunther, I like you.
10:49 Really? I like you too. I think you're Okay, 'cause
10:52 That feels amazing,
10:53 'cause we got told we weren't allowed to be friends with the cast.
10:57 Who said that?
10:58 I don't wanna be a person that's like, "It was Gavin," but, yeah.
11:02 Know how I feel about that?
11:04 -Fuck you, Gavin! -Do you?
11:05 Suck your mum, Gavin! Say it from your chest.
11:08 What? [mumbles] Fuck you, Gavin!
11:10 I need to be real with you. I don't understand these bullshit rules.
11:13 Been in my room two weeks. I ain't had human contact.
11:16 It's important for my mental and physical health
11:18 to have human contact with friends.
11:20 -We're friends! -Completely.
11:22 -What will happen if I touch you? Huh? -We could die.
11:25 Yeah, completely. It's kind of the situation.
11:27 -Yeah. -Boop!
11:28 -Um-- -Did we die? Are you dead?
11:31 You've just got to understand that my job, as a health officer,
11:35 is to make sure that everything that we're doing is as safe as possible.
11:40 All the best, Gunther.
11:41 ["You're Pouring Water On a Drowning Man" playing]
11:43 -Um, my dad does stunts. -Hi.
11:46 Um, I'm lonely, and I'm in hell here,
11:49 and I would like to form an alliance with you.
11:54 [hesitates] Okay, yeah, sure.
11:57 All right, okay.
12:00 It was hard doing the last one without you.
12:02 Uh, yeah, I'm sorry. I got really bad advice from my reps
12:05 and was also having some, ahem, emotional issues.
12:08 That's where you were on your journey, and it brought you right back here.
12:11 -[Carol] Exactly. -It's all good.
12:13 -I heard you were starting a religion. -No, it's a [chuckles nervously]
12:17 It's a lifestyle brand slash motivational system
12:19 called Harmony Ignite.
12:21 Wow. And you wrote a whole Bible.
12:23 Well, I wrote a book. A book called Harmony Ignited.
12:26 And, uh, it's just a collection of my thoughts and musings
12:29 and some sayings and wisdom and proverbs. That's it, yeah.
12:33 It's not a religion, per se. You can leave anytime that you want to.
12:38 -It's not, like, a cult. -No, it's definitely not a cult.
12:41 I mean, who defines what a cult is?
12:43 -Yeah. -Okay.
12:44 You know what? I'm gonna be really straightforward with you right now
12:48 and let you know that we are co-parents to Raphael, and that is it.
12:53 That's true.
12:54 So what happened on parts one and three and four is not happening again.
12:59 What about what we did on part two?
13:02 You have no respect for me.
13:03 I have nothing but respect for you.
13:07 Stop.
13:09 Stop.
13:10 -Stop it. -Stop.
13:13 I would appreciate if you didn't look at me like that.
13:16 -Where should I look? -I can't look at you.
13:20 -I'm still here though. -[sighs]
13:22 I know you.
13:23 -God. Hi. -[laughs]
13:25 -How are you doing? Sorry to scare you. -Don't worry.
13:27 I am so excited that you are here.
13:30 Oh, yeah. No, I'm so excited.
13:32 Gotta tell you, I love the TikTok stuff.
13:34 You are crushing it. Absolutely crushing it.
13:37 I mean, clearly. 120 million followers. You are unbelievable.
13:40 I love the one where you and your cat lip-synch to Harry Potter.
13:44 I can't believe you've seen all that.
13:46 [laughs] It's fantastic!
13:47 Hey, maybe you and I can do one together while we're here.
13:51 -Oh, yeah, maybe. -Yeah.
13:53 -What's your name? -Carla.
13:55 Nice to meet you. You got great energy about you.
13:58 Gavs!
14:01 Who is that?
14:03 One of the actors. He's not that good though.
14:05 -[piano music playing] -May I refresh your water?
14:09 Yeah, please.
14:12 Thanks.
14:13 Why you look at me with weird eyes? [chuckles]
14:19 [Dieter sighs]
14:23 -Jesus fucking Christ. -Wow.
14:26 -[man] Hey! -[woman] Hey!
14:28 -[Gavin] Okay. -Hit us with it, Gav.
14:30 Welcome! I'm gonna introduce somebody now who is
14:35 He's special.
14:38 He's funny.
14:40 He's extremely intelligent.
14:43 And he's a
14:46 He's a visionary.
14:49 He shot a brilliant movie called Tiles of Love
14:52 while working at Home Depot.
14:54 -Our director Darren Eigen! -[cheering]
14:59 -[whistling] Whoo! -Thank you! Thanks, you guys. Uh
15:03 I just wanna say
15:05 I am so lucky to be able to work with a cast this talented.
15:09 This is your car,
15:12 and I'm gonna step in and take the wheel.
15:15 This drive is gonna be a little crazy.
15:18 Gonna head towards the railing a couple of times. Might hit it.
15:22 Some of you might not even survive.
15:24 But I've got the end of the road in my sight.
15:30 Might be a crazy ride,
15:33 but it's gonna look great,
15:36 and it's gonna make the world forget all their problems.
15:41 So,
15:42 let's go for a ride.
15:44 We're fucked.
15:46 ["Boss Bitch" by Doja Cat playing]
15:48 Are you sure it's safe?
15:50 Just don't put your hands too close to your face.
15:52 -[squawking] -[nervously] Oh, shit. Aah!
15:55 No! No! No!
15:57 -[Darren] Grab. Nice. Right arm. Block. -[grunting]
16:01 Move around. Good. Let me hear the rage. Aah. Spins around, kick. Great.
16:06 [trainer] Get him, boy. Get him!
16:08 -[screaming] -[dog growling and snarling]
16:11 Heart shot! Yeah!
16:13 Dick shot!
16:14 [trainer] Over.
16:15 Pow.
16:17 [Howie] Oi! And roll.
16:20 -[grunts] -[exclaims]
16:21 [both grunting]
16:24 [mimics choking]
16:27 [yells]
16:28 [trainer] Rusty, come! Come on, boy!
16:30 Can you train him to peck off Dustin's balls?
16:33 [laughing]
16:35 I'm just kidding.
16:37 But can you? [laughing]
16:39 Said bitch, I'm the after You been the before
16:41 I been the stallion You been the seahorse
16:43 Don't need a report Don't need a press run
16:45 All of my bad pics Been all my best ones
16:47 I wear the hat And I wear the pants
16:48 I am advanced I get advance
16:50 And I do my dance And cancel the plans
16:52 Boo, don't be mad 'Cause you had the chance
16:54 Drop, said I took it and I ran for it I won it, then I stand on it
16:58 Money on the floor when we dance on it Shine bright, let them put a tan on it
17:02 Said I took it and I ran for it I won it, then I stand on it
17:06 Money on the floor When we dance on it
17:08 Shine bright Let them put a tan on it like
17:10 I'm a bitch, I'm a boss
17:12 I'm a bitch and a boss I'mma shine like gloss
17:14 I'm a bitch, I'm a boss
17:15 I'm a bitch and a boss I'mma shine like gloss
17:17 I'm a bitch, I'm a boss
17:19 I'm a bitch and a boss I'mma shine like gloss
17:21 I'm a bitch, I'm a boss
17:23 I'm a bitch and a boss I'mma shine like gloss
17:29 Gavin, how are you?
17:31 Hi! [chuckles] How are you doing?
17:34 Oh, good. I just wanted to say, uh, good luck,
17:37 and we love you, and we're counting on you.
17:40 I know. I'm on it.
17:41 You are such a hero for keeping the lights on at the studio.
17:45 This lockdown has been so hard on all of us.
17:49 But you're skiing?
17:51 Yeah, well, this was the only country that was open. Thank God I got my shot.
17:55 [chuckles] Did you? I thought they weren't available for six months.
17:58 Oh, they're not. Not for normal people, but I'm with rich people.
18:02 Don't hate the player, hate the game. Ugh! I hate the game.
18:05 Anyway, have a great shoot.
18:08 I love you. I'm in love with you.
18:11 And do not fuck me!
18:14 So the thing about Harmony Ignite is it's about dreams.
18:17 It's about how you go about fulfilling your dreams.
18:20 I'm not really looking for a new religion.
18:23 I'm Hindu. Many gods, very busy.
18:25 -I have a question for you, man. -Mm-hmm.
18:28 -What's your dream? -My dream?
18:30 Your dream. I wanna hear it.
18:33 This won't be the last pandemic. We all know that.
18:36 -Absolutely. -We still need to have sex.
18:38 My brother, a software engineer in India, has invented a glove.
18:41 It's like a hand that you can wrap around you
18:44 or put inside you, anally.
18:46 Then somewhere, in a different city, somebody else has the hand,
18:50 and then they do things to the hand that you feel on you or inside you.
18:55 You're safe. It's sanitary ecstasy. You'll be wearing virtual reality goggles,
18:59 so you can have sex anywhere in the world with anyone.
19:03 Well, thank you for coming to pick up my tray. Appreciate it.
19:07 Oh, no. Sure, yeah. Uh
19:10 This was
19:11 If you get lonely
19:14 [whimsical music playing]
19:16 Anika.
19:17 Hi.
19:18 I was wondering if you could help.
19:21 With what?
19:22 You wanna have sex with me?
19:23 Yes, I do!
19:25 -[thumps desk] -Amazing.
19:26 Not now.
19:28 When?
19:29 When I get to know you, because I like you.
19:32 -Great. -Then I would like you to meet my father.
19:36 And if you get his permission, you will sign a lifelong agreement
19:39 because I am a pure angel,
19:41 and you won't come across someone like me again.
19:54 [pleasant music playing]
19:55 [Gunther] Okay, hi, guys!
19:57 Yeah, let's talk about zones for a moment. Uh, there are three main ones, okay?
20:01 There's Red Zone. That's the best zone. That's the actors, okay?
20:05 Then there's Blue Zone. That's for crew.
20:07 Then there's Yellow Zone for office staff. We don't need to worry about that.
20:12 Um, a lot of you have been asking about flirting.
20:15 Yes, it happens. Um, physical touch is, of course, off the table.
20:18 Um, so what I would recommend is making sweet eyes at each other.
20:22 Um, if you're wondering what that looks like, that'd be
20:27 [chuckles softly] Mm.
20:31 [chuckling] Wha
20:35 Oh.
20:37 Mm.
20:39 Are there any questions?
20:42 Amazing! Let's have some fun.
20:44 [heroic instrumental music playing]
20:49 [man 1] So, uh, Gio, this is your first expedition up Mount Everest?
20:54 [in ambiguous accent] Yes, but, uh, it is not news to me
20:57 that Modelcorp is lucky to have hired all of you
21:00 to make sure all the creatures of this land are respected
21:06 and honored.
21:07 [man 2] It's not a creature.
21:09 What we hear from the locals, we may be dealing with a cliff beast.
21:13 Climate change has melted the whole top of the mountain.
21:16 It's a burnt wasteland.
21:19 The beast must have come out of the melted permafrost.
21:21 [cliff beast growling]
21:23 [suspenseful music playing]
21:24 Global warming, my ass! Who did this?
21:28 Uh, man.
21:31 And wo-man.
21:32 One thing I've learned growing up in the mossy savannas of Alabama
21:36 is if you've seen one June bug,
21:39 there's more than likely 500 more waiting in the wings.
21:42 -We've seen this before. -Five times is what I have heard.
21:45 [distant growling]
21:47 Why are we going towards the dinosaurs? That's where the danger is!
21:50 -[squealing in distance] -[gasps]
21:52 Oh, no. That sounds like a baby crying for its mama.
21:56 [man screaming]
21:57 That ain't no baby!
21:59 [intense music playing]
22:02 My God, what are we gonna do?
22:04 [man screaming]
22:06 [all screaming]
22:09 Somebody help him!
22:10 [man 1] Drop him!
22:11 [loud growling]
22:16 Hang in there!
22:17 How does he fly? He has no feathers!
22:19 Well, somebody taught him how to fly!
22:22 [man 2] Please stop!
22:24 It's okay. I got him!
22:26 [both yelling]
22:29 -[music stops] -[all yelling]
22:34 [Darren] All right, cut!
22:36 -Great work. -[bell ringing]
22:37 -That was a great take. -Moving on.
22:40 -Oh, um, Sean? -Yeah?
22:41 Did you have a chance to read the screenplay I sent you?
22:45 Oh. They're bringing me down. I'm sorry, buddy.
22:49 -Oh, I can still hear you. -[Sean] One second. Getting unplugged.
22:51 Darren, one note before we move on?
22:54 I don't get when Dolly says, "Somebody taught him how to fly."
22:57 They're cliff beasts. It's in their DNA. That's what they do. They fly.
23:01 You can't rewrite my lines. You're not the writer.
23:04 But it goes against dinosaur logic.
23:05 Why are you rewriting the script? We have a writer. Aren't you an actor?
23:09 Yes, but I'm also the guardian of the franchise.
23:12 -So I'm rewriting it. -We have somebody.
23:15 Can we play to the top of our audience's intelligence?
23:17 No, our audience is down here. They're kids. That's our audience.
23:20 Don't listen to him. He doesn't want me to have the big crowd-applause line.
23:24 Lauren, all of your lines will be big applause lines
23:27 if movie theaters ever open again.
23:29 Carol hates the writing too.
23:31 What? Carol?
23:33 Lauren, that was private!
23:35 Plus, I also didn't say it.
23:37 That is exactly why I asked them not to bring you back after you bailed.
23:41 -I didn't bail. Am I getting coffee? -[man] Mm-hmm.
23:44 -He doesn't know what he's doing. -What are you doing?
23:47 Covering your mic so people can't hear us.
23:50 I know. I do feel like my dialogue is a little lackluster.
23:53 So let me fix it. Let me punch it up.
23:56 -Can you do that? -I can punch it up.
23:58 Let me take care of you.
24:00 How are you gonna take care of me?
24:02 Well, I'm gonna start dialogue-wise,
24:04 and then, you know, move on from there, I guess?
24:07 -You're gonna punch me up? -Oh, yeah.
24:11 [laughs whimsically]
24:13 Guys, if you make any changes to the script, can you just cc me on it?
24:17 At least?
24:19 [softly] "Guardian of the franchise"? Assholes. I won Sundance!
24:23 -What's the point of us being up here? -Eyelines. So they know where to look.
24:28 Pretty cool.
24:30 [grunts]
24:31 [piano playing]
24:33 Why do birds suddenly appear
24:38 Every time you are near?
24:43 Just like me
24:46 They long to be
24:47 Close to you
24:50 And you and you.
24:52 [humming]
24:54 -What's this? [laughs] -What's the next bit?
24:56 Hey, guys. Just listen up for a second.
24:59 Um
25:00 We have had a situation on set
25:04 that means we're going to shut down production
25:07 and go back into quarantine.
25:09 [laughter]
25:11 That's not even funny.
25:14 Screw you, Gavin. That's hilarious, man.
25:17 I wish I was joking, but I'm not. You all have to go back to your rooms.
25:22 No!
25:23 We had a positive test on set,
25:26 and although I am forbidden from telling you who it was,
25:29 let's just say it's the girl who gets your coffees.
25:32 Um, her name's Wendy.
25:33 That creepy PA?
25:35 Yeah, production were trying to be safe by sending one person to get the coffees,
25:39 when in fact that led to Wendy touching about 80 coffee cups this morning.
25:43 We're gonna die.
25:45 -No, we're not gonna die! Howie. -[actors clamoring]
25:48 Is this how it always goes?
25:50 No, this is a shit show.
25:52 -Guys, calm down! -Oi!
25:55 [emotionally] I am a mother, so I have to go!
25:59 Or I need a larger room.
26:01 If I could just switch rooms with Howie,
26:03 because he has the tub, and I have only a shower!
26:07 [Howie] Yeah, but in Pakistan, you ain't shit!
26:09 Okay, guys, listen, okay? I have had the virus three times, okay?
26:15 And the first time, I didn't even notice it.
26:17 Second time, was in a coma.
26:19 The third time, I lost my sense of sort of taste and smell
26:22 and how I felt about people.
26:23 Trust me, that is something that you want to avoid.
26:26 I think he's still sick.
26:27 I can't wear rings anymore
26:29 because my fingers change size every single day.
26:32 I can't do this, man. I can't stay in my room any longer on my own.
26:35 If you make me, I'll fuck my chair!
26:37 No. Look, guys, we're here for you.
26:40 So don't worry. Once you're all back in your rooms,
26:44 we're gonna take great care of you.
26:46 You have to go into your room too.
26:48 -Why? -You had a latte.
26:50 -Oh, fuck! -I know.
26:52 So how are you feeling about the new quarantine?
26:55 -[people clamoring] -Really? Really?
26:57 -Sorry, when would be a good time-- -Never.
26:59 -Fuck off! -Perfect.
27:00 It's ten seconds and we're done. Are you ready?
27:02 Yeah, let's go. Let's go.
27:05 -["Might bang, Might not" playing] -[yells]
27:07 Fuck you! Fuck you, you fucking bastard!
27:09 I'm gonna kill you, and then I'm gonna murder your ghost!
27:13 That was not too bad.
27:16 You okay?
27:17 and give you my space Know that that shit's not to waste, yo
27:20 Still better know your place, yo
27:22 I ain't slept good in days, yo
27:25 -I'm sorry. -I'll wait.
27:28 -That's a little too deep. -[Gunther] It's better that way. I think
27:34 -Are you Excuse me, are you all right? -[Gunther] Yes. Yeah, yeah.
27:37 You ain't seen no one like me since Lauryn Hill back in the '90s, bitch
27:41 Feeling myself
27:42 [humming]
27:44 The olders make way For the '90s kid
27:45 Please don't kill my high, I been
27:48 Fuck you! You're not gonna win! I am gonna win, you motherfucker!
27:52 "How many species have died because of man? Thousands!"
27:56 "I think it's snack time. For them."
27:58 [in ambiguous accent] "These cliff beasts are so large! How do they fly?"
28:02 "How? How?"
28:03 "How do they fly?"
28:05 "There's nothing left to eat but us."
28:07 [inhales sharply]
28:09 "These cliff beasts are so large!"
28:11 Sound idea for a cliff beast. Here's beast one.
28:15 [growling]
28:18 Swooping down.
28:19 [high-pitched screeching]
28:22 Mating.
28:23 [grunting and moaning]
28:26 Mourning the loss of a child.
28:28 [whimpering purr]
28:32 Full rage.
28:33 [loud roaring]
28:37 Mother, I can't do 13 more days of this!
28:40 I've already been doing this for 12 hours. It's too much!
28:42 Hey, guys, it's Krystal.
28:44 Um, I'm back in quarantine in my room.
28:47 I'm gonna need a lot of movie suggestions,
28:49 but I wanna watch more, like, dark stuff.
28:52 Everyone told me to watch this movie, E.T.? Felt a little racist.
28:55 I don't wanna watch anything that'd offend my fans.
28:58 I have respect for everybody that follows me.
29:00 Sean, you are not in competition with Krystal.
29:03 You are not aging. You don't need 100 million followers.
29:09 I am titanium!
29:10 I am invincible! Age is an illusion!
29:12 Time cannot catch me! Never die!
29:13 ["Pardon My Freedom" by !!! playing]
29:16 Like I give a fuck Like I give a shit about that fuck
29:20 Like I give a fuck Like I give a shit about that fuck
29:24 Like I give a fuck about that
29:26 [Howie] I need weed immediately! Buy a drone.
29:28 Attach my marijuana to the drone. Fly that shit through my fucking window!
29:32 "I just want a safe place for the dinosaurs to live!"
29:37 [Dieter yells]
29:39 [giggles]
29:45 [crying]
29:48 [manic laughter]
29:53 -[both chuckle] -[pleasant music playing]
29:55 I really couldn't do this without you.
29:57 I probably could do it without you, but that's just because I'm used to it.
30:02 This is the first time I've left Indiana.
30:05 So did you, like, audition for the movie or what?
30:08 I think they just jammed me in this movie because I have a lot of followers.
30:12 Must be fun having 100 million followers.
30:15 Sometimes I just want a break,
30:16 but my mom just tells me if I don't keep putting out content,
30:21 then everybody's just gonna forget about me, so
30:23 I can help you if you want.
30:26 You know, I've never had a normal friend.
30:31 No one's ever called me normal before.
30:33 [laughing]
30:35 Why are you laughing?
30:38 You're such a freak.
30:41 [Sean] Whoo! I'm doing it, son!
30:44 [laughs boisterously]
30:46 This is awesome!
30:48 Gavin, buddy, can you hear me?
30:50 Yeah.
30:51 This is all I'm doing? I'm just going up?
30:54 You're only allowed to learn how to go up.
30:57 That's all we need for the shot in the movie.
31:00 [Sean] If I can go forward just even a little bit,
31:02 my fans, they will shit their dicks.
31:05 Gavin, is this safe? Why is he doing this?
31:07 He wouldn't do the movie unless we let him do this.
31:11 How exciting is it to direct a movie with a $100 million budget?
31:15 It's a lot of pressure.
31:16 Well, it would be a lot of pressure if the cast wasn't so brilliant.
31:20 See you later, buddy.
31:21 Are you worried people won't watch a movie about dinosaurs,
31:24 given the serious nature of the global pandemic?
31:27 Hey, are you being a fly on the wall?
31:30 You're a pretty noisy fucking fly! I can hardly hear the helicopter!
31:34 Sorry, just doing my job.
31:35 What job is that? Trying to get in my fucking head?
31:39 Like he wants me to fail!
31:41 Don't let him mess with your focus. Everybody wants you to fail.
31:44 Don't give a fuck about him.
31:46 What?
31:53 -Where's Ronjon? -You asked for a tray table to be removed.
31:56 I said send Ronjon.
31:58 You wanted sex, but you will get love.
32:03 Hold on.
32:04 [slow instrumental music playing]
32:16 Isn't that nice?
32:19 You don't know me!
32:22 [playing a pleasant tune]
32:25 Am I a great director?
32:29 Yes, of course you are.
32:31 You have a vision.
32:32 -Yeah, I think I do. -Yeah.
32:34 So what do I do when Dustin keeps trying to rewrite the script?
32:38 When he tells you his ideas, tell him you'll think about them,
32:43 and then never get back to him.
32:45 You do that to me.
32:46 No, with you, I'm actually thinking.
32:48 [laughing]
32:51 I'm just playing around.
32:54 Making movies is fun!
32:57 That's why we do it!
32:59 I'm sorry I skipped your mom's funeral to go to the People's Choice Awards.
33:04 I'm sorry that I
33:07 burned down your back office.
33:09 I'm sorry I slept with your agent.
33:13 -Sorry that-- -And your manager.
33:16 And your divorce lawyer.
33:18 -Yeah. -Uh
33:20 I'm sorry I gave up on us.
33:23 [sighs] Why is it always so hard?
33:25 [sighs] I think 'cause you're so strong. You're so intimidating. So talented.
33:31 Hmm.
33:33 I feel like nobody would be able to fix the script the way you do
33:37 and stay in such incredible shape.
33:42 And you
33:44 are an amazing mother.
33:46 -[whimsical music playing] -[gasps softly]
33:48 -Take me to the peak! -We are on a mountain!
33:52 [Lauren] Mount Everest! [laughing]
33:55 -Ooh. I think I see one of the crew. -Oh, shit. Get
33:59 Uh, so how is the major motion picture going?
34:03 It's fine. Everybody's just old.
34:06 Is there somebody cute there?
34:08 -[chuckling] -Who you maybe wanna smooch with?
34:11 Don't be gross, Mom! God!
34:13 Is Timmy-thee Oilyphant there? Oh.
34:17 -No! -I could
34:19 Why are you saying it like that? That's not his name!
34:22 But I wish he was here. I do. He's very cute.
34:25 Oh. Are you nervous to meet the dinosaurs during your act?
34:29 Mom, they're not real!
34:31 They, like They put them in after.
34:33 I thought there was an elephant wearing a mask or something.
34:36 I wish you were here. I'm so lonely.
34:40 Aww! [squealing]
34:46 [chuckles]
34:47 [thudding overhead]
34:48 -[chandelier tinkling] -[moans softly]
34:51 [heavy thud]
34:53 [sighs]
34:55 Come on! [huffs]
34:59 [whimsical music playing]
35:10 [thudding continues]
35:13 -Oh! Jesus! [grunts] -You okay?
35:16 -I'm fine! -Let me check.
35:18 -Hey, whoa, social distancing. -Sorry.
35:20 Why are you kicking balls around?
35:22 Uh, I'm with my squad. We're just bubbling before the big game.
35:26 -A game? What kind of a game? -Football.
35:28 Soccer. I play for Betis.
35:31 Oh. I didn't realize anybody else was in this hotel.
35:34 Well, we are.
35:36 Well, I'm bubbling too. I'm an actress, and we're making a movie.
35:41 I know you.
35:42 Cliff Beasts.
35:44 Dr. Lacie.
35:46 Yes, that's me, Dr. Lacie.
35:48 You're in Jerusalem Rising too, right?
35:50 -Yes. -I have to ask.
35:52 Are you half-Palestinian, half-Israeli?
35:55 Actually, I'm not either.
35:57 Great acting.
35:59 Ah! That's so good to hear. So many people got mad at me.
36:02 Everyone was offended. I was like, "I'm just trying to create a piece of art
36:06 that might help solve the issues."
36:08 Peace.
36:10 Well, Lacie, would you like to, uh, go to my room right now and just talk for a bit?
36:17 -I'd like to talk. -Yeah, me too.
36:19 I feel like I haven't talked in a very long time.
36:22 I'm a lot of fun to talk to.
36:25 I've just been talking to myself lately.
36:27 If I don't talk to you, I think I'm going to explode.
36:30 But I don't think we're allowed to cross bubbles.
36:33 No, we wouldn't be crossing bubbles.
36:36 We'd be making a new bubble.
36:38 Then we're just inside each other's bubbles.
36:41 [exhales]
36:44 No. No, no, no. No, we can't. Stop it. Stop it.
36:48 Goodbye, Dr. Lacie.
36:51 [meditation music playing]
36:53 -[Bola] Hello, friends. Good morning. -[exhales]
36:57 Thank you all for joining our morning meditation.
37:01 This is our opportunity to breathe, let go of our troubles, and recharge.
37:07 Yeah.
37:08 [Bola] I want you to close your eyes.
37:12 -Let the air fill your lungs -[inhales]
37:16 and release the fear of catching the virus.
37:21 And release the fear of the movie industry collapsing,
37:26 leaving all of you penniless.
37:28 Why you saying that?
37:29 Breathe in, and breathe out that fear
37:33 that the world is soon going to realize
37:36 you people are not that special.
37:39 One might say useless.
37:41 -Excuse me, Bola. -[Bola] Yeah?
37:43 I can't take this. I can't take this shit no more, please.
37:46 Don't judge your thoughts. Observe them!
37:48 I can't observe them. This is more than I can take. Yeah, I'm in pain.
37:53 And I'm bored. Bored as fuck in this hotel!
37:56 I need out of the hotel right now!
37:58 Howie, let me tell you about Harmony Ignite.
38:00 Sean, do us a favor?
38:02 -Yeah. -Harmony Ignite your asshole!
38:04 -Howie! -Howie, easy!
38:06 You can't leave. You're the comic relief of the movie.
38:09 Fuck you, you fucker! How's that for witty comic relief? Huh?
38:11 [Sean] Howie.
38:12 I don't even know why you're complaining. It's not that bad being here.
38:16 Why you talking to me? Your dances pave the way to the hellfire.
38:19 -[Dustin] Howie. -[Carol] Oh, my God.
38:21 Emotions are like a wave. You just gotta ride 'em.
38:24 -Like a wave? -Let it pass.
38:26 -Let me show you a wave. -Oh, my God! Howie!
38:28 -Howie! -[Darren] Let go.
38:30 Are you riding the wave? How's this wave for you?
38:32 -Howie, you're hurting him. -I've got his dick in my hand! His lulli!
38:36 Let go of his lulli.
38:37 Howie, release! Release!
38:39 I'll rip his lulli off if you keep pushing me!
38:42 Don't push me! That's enough. I'm gone from here.
38:45 Sick of this place! What kind of devilish business going on in here?
38:48 Hey, hey, hey! What's going on here?
38:50 I'll tell you what. I'm leaving!
38:52 Howie, you are not leaving. We are in the middle of shooting!
38:56 I don't give a shit. You can replace me.
38:58 That's not true! No one can play Jarrar but you.
39:00 You're irreplaceable!
39:02 Anybody could play Jarrar! Should I tell you why? Batman!
39:05 -Batman? -He was Michael Keaton, yeah?
39:07 Then he was Val Kilmer.
39:08 Then George Clooney, but he brought too much sex to the role!
39:11 They got rid of him, brought in Ben Affleck, Christian Bale,
39:14 now he's that skinny bastard from Twilight.
39:16 Not within the same movie!
39:18 Zip! Gavin, everybody is replaceable.
39:21 This is a very judgmental business. You leave, you'll be blackballed.
39:25 Thank you for your concern, but I am gone!
39:28 And you can fuck off!
39:30 [actors] Howie!
39:31 Howie, your weed turned up this morning!
39:34 -Howie! -Howie, where are you going?
39:36 -I'm going to London! -Send help!
39:39 -[Lauren] We need you! -[Sean] What are you doing?
39:41 -Howie! Come on! -[Carol] Howie!
39:43 -[Bola] That was pretty good. -[Carol] He's okay.
39:45 Howie Frangopolous! Come back!
39:49 [Howie] Finally, escaped to freedom!
39:52 Tah, tah, tah!
39:53 That is not London. He is going the wrong way.
39:56 Goodbye, Howie!
39:58 Goodbye!
40:08 Um What is going on?
40:11 Oh. A little bit of extra protection for you. A little bit of security.
40:15 Don't worry! We'll pop stickers on your backs.
40:18 -[Carol] Your hands are cold. -[Sean] What's going on our backs?
40:20 -[device beeps] -Hey! That is cold!
40:22 Sticker like a name badge?
40:24 Kind of, yeah. Just so we know where you are,
40:26 who you are, social distancing.
40:28 You're tracking us?
40:29 We're keeping you safe.
40:31 So it's just for health reasons. So we can keep the machine moving.
40:35 Understood, yeah.
40:37 [Gavin] Hey, gang!
40:38 I see you've all met Mr. Best, our new head of security.
40:42 We're in good hands with Mr. Best.
40:44 He was recently head of security for DaBaby.
40:46 Lovely lad.
40:48 I'm not wearing one of those, man. It's radiation. It's EMF.
40:51 Messes with my fucking brain waves. I don't even wear wireless earbuds.
40:55 -Hey! -Gavin
40:58 Not your job.
40:59 [Sean] He'll do it. He's doing it.
41:00 [Gavin] Should we take it easy?
41:02 -There you go. -Okay, all done?
41:03 -[Carol] A little rough. -That's a little, uh
41:06 What the fuck?
41:06 Right, off you go! There's a Golden Globe waiting for you!
41:11 Okay, guys, thank you very much. Thank you. Appreciate it.
41:15 Shit is getting real on Cliff Beasts.
41:18 Was that necessary?
41:19 No, just trying to get it in the can, as per instructions.
41:23 No one's gonna go wandering off now, are they?
41:25 [dramatic music playing]
41:29 [Dustin] Maybe Jarrar just wandered off.
41:32 [Lauren] You don't wander off on Everest.
41:34 He's a quitter. Once a quitter, always a quitter.
41:37 [in ambiguous accent] The corporation will not be happy.
41:40 I'm beginning to wonder about this corporation.
41:45 [gasps]
41:46 What is this?
41:47 [suspenseful music playing]
41:51 This is Jarrar's reversible polar fleece.
41:53 Well, maybe he got tired and he made camp here somewhere.
41:57 I am not so optimistic.
42:02 What is that?
42:03 [music intensifies]
42:07 -[Lauren] Sweet Jesus in a basket. -[flies buzzing]
42:14 Is that Jarrar?
42:15 It might not be him.
42:17 There are a lot of inexperienced hikers up here.
42:20 But that is his belt.
42:22 That doesn't mean anything. I got the same belt.
42:25 [loud growl]
42:30 [screeches]
42:33 Looks like he's feeding.
42:43 It is so large. How does it fly?
42:54 [screaming]
42:56 [pants] I checked the whole west face. No sign of him.
42:59 [Lauren gasping]
43:00 [dramatic music playing]
43:03 [screaming]
43:04 [both screaming]
43:06 [all screaming]
43:08 -Cut! It's great. -[bell ringing]
43:10 -What do you think? Is it gonna work? -Hmm.
43:12 -I've got one thought. -Yeah.
43:15 Fuck Howie.
43:16 [laughing]
43:18 You're bad!
43:21 [line ringing]
43:24 Hello?
43:25 Hello. Is Josh there?
43:28 Hold on. Josh!
43:30 [Josh] Coming!
43:31 Will you turn off the bath?
43:33 Hey, Carol. What's up?
43:35 Hi. Who was that?
43:37 Uh, well, that's Monica.
43:40 Who is Monica?
43:41 She's the
43:43 the server that you liked who waited on us on Valentine's Day.
43:46 She's the waitress from Baltaire?
43:48 Don't say "waitress" with that tone. She risks her life to feed people!
43:51 -Why is she in my house? -[Josh sighs]
43:54 Look, I'm just gonna say this, all right?
43:56 I'm breaking up with you.
43:58 [chuckles] What?
44:00 And it's not just about Monica either.
44:02 I realized that all you care about is yourself, and not me.
44:05 Where is this coming from?
44:07 Of course I care. I care about you so much!
44:09 You care about me so much that you jump on a plane to London during a plague!
44:14 -I can't believe this! -[Josh] Say goodbye to Carol!
44:17 Who's Carol?
44:18 -[line disconnects] -[sniffles]
44:20 [piano music playing softly on speakers]
44:22 -Pippa? -Hmm?
44:24 Do you wanna have sex with me?
44:27 I'm eating, blud.
44:29 Sorry. Sorry.
44:32 Gunther?
44:35 I'm done eating, but I'm okay, thank you.
44:41 [whimsical music playing]
44:46 [exhales nervously]
44:49 [clears throat]
44:51 [Carol] Hi.
44:52 Dr. Lacie.
44:55 -I dreamed it would be you. -You did?
44:57 -My name is Zaki. -Oh, I was gonna ask you.
44:59 -Let's talk. -Okay.
45:01 [Carol clears throat]
45:05 Hello!
45:07 [both laughing]
45:08 -Hey, Rafi! -Point the camera up.
45:10 -Move the camera. -Fine.
45:11 [Dustin] Let me see that
45:12 -[Lauren] Hi! -Nice 'stache.
45:14 How's the homework?
45:15 I'm quitting high school. I don't need it. My friends said I can get a trust fund.
45:19 -Guess what? -What?
45:21 Mommy and Papa are back together.
45:24 Mom, I thought you were dating the guy who used to be on Friends!
45:27 -Raphael, stop it! -Dad is the devil!
45:29 What?
45:30 He's never gonna change! I googled him. He's done some fucked-up shit.
45:34 I've gotta finish my game. Bye!
45:36 Rafi!
45:39 What a nightmare!
45:41 -Ever wonder if we picked the right kid? -Don't say that.
45:44 No, when we got him, they said he was just shy and that he'd warm up,
45:48 but he never warmed up--
45:50 [Rafi] I can hear you!
45:52 Man, you guys are a bag full of dicks!
45:55 Fuck!
45:57 No!
45:59 That was
46:00 There's no coming back from that.
46:02 [whimsical music playing]
46:06 I don't think we're allowed to leave the hotel. I signed something.
46:09 We're 18. They expect us to do this.
46:11 Okay, let's go to London.
46:17 [both giggle]
46:20 Make me smile.
46:24 Hmm
46:26 [screen chimes]
46:28 Hello, I'm Kate.
46:30 Welcome to your 30-minute morning stretch.
46:33 Are you ready to start a new day with new habits?
46:37 Change me. Change me.
46:39 -Great! -Change me.
46:41 I'm ready too.
46:42 Let's go. We're just gonna start with a really easy swing.
46:46 No stress. Great.
46:49 Let's come down.
46:52 Let's just take a moment to connect with the earth.
46:55 [exhales sharply]
46:58 -Dieter. -Huh?
47:00 You're kind of cute.
47:04 I like your hair.
47:07 For our next exercise,
47:09 I would like you to enter me for 30 thrusts.
47:12 Let's do that ten times,
47:15 and continue until I say we're done.
47:20 That's a lot of sets.
47:21 -[both panting] -I love you, Dr. Lacie.
47:24 I love you too. But it's Carol.
47:27 [moans] Carol Lacie.
47:29 -No, just Carol! -[both gasp]
47:31 Dr. Carol.
47:32 -No, I'm not a doctor. -[grunts]
47:35 Kate?
47:38 Are you me?
47:39 I'm you. You're me. I'm horny. Who cares?
47:42 This is creepy,
47:44 but I like it.
47:45 Shut up. Get over here.
47:48 Yes, ma'am.
47:53 [upbeat music playing]
48:00 [both moaning and gasping]
48:02 [speaking Spanish]
48:04 I don't understand!
48:05 [moaning loudly]
48:07 [both panting]
48:13 Did you?
48:15 No.
48:16 I never orgasm.
48:18 Oh! [moaning]
48:22 [Kate, repeating] Are you ready to start a new day?
48:26 [Dieter] I'm sorry.
48:27 [whimsical music playing]
48:29 Ronjon, make sure you spend time on that pineapple. Each groove.
48:34 All right.
48:36 Thank you.
48:37 [shivering]
48:41 Oh, my God.
48:43 I think I'm sick.
48:45 Yeah, you're sick with love.
48:48 No, I think it's the virus.
48:51 You can't have the virus. We're in the bubble.
48:56 [vomiting]
48:59 Bola, hold my hair.
49:01 Your hair is short. There is no hair to hold!
49:03 [groaning] Hold my hair!
49:05 Uh, I don't want to be here. I want to resign.
49:08 [sobbing] Bola
49:10 Uh
49:12 [hesitates] I really don't want to.
49:15 -I'm not supposed to be here. -[sobs] Bola
49:17 Where do I hold? Okay!
49:19 [vomiting, grunts]
49:22 [Bola] No! No, no, no, no!
49:24 [farts]
49:25 [both screaming]
49:28 [Gavin] Okay, guys? Uh, listen up.
49:31 Uh, I've got some very important health news for you.
49:34 -You all tested negative for the virus. -Yes!
49:38 However, some of you have tested positive for influenza.
49:44 -The good virus. -[Gunther] The good one.
49:46 Two of you tested positive
49:48 for two separate cases of sexually transmitted diseases.
49:52 How'd we get the flu? We're in the bubble.
49:55 [Gavin] We've narrowed it down to a delivery person
49:57 and one of the gardeners. We are handling it.
49:59 If this is just the normal flu,
50:01 we could push on and complete the day, right?
50:04 Absolutely, yeah.
50:05 Actors are some of the toughest people I know. We can handle it.
50:09 I once played host to a 30-foot-long tapeworm
50:13 during Cliff Beasts 2, and nobody even knew.
50:16 I broke my wrist and ankle on the last movie I did.
50:19 -I didn't tell anybody. -Good lad. That's the spirit.
50:22 I'm very concerned about Carol and Dieter.
50:25 I think they should at least have the rest of the day off.
50:28 We're not shutting this down for a bit of snot.
50:31 Let's have a show of hands, okay? Who wants to power through today?
50:35 [coughing]
50:36 Right, let's get out there and kill some cliff beasts!
50:41 -[actors] Yeah! -Yes!
50:42 [dramatic music playing]
50:46 [straining]
50:47 [loud growling in distance]
50:49 I can hear something!
50:51 The nest must be close.
50:54 [grunting]
50:59 You guys better get moving, or you're gonna be bird seed.
51:02 [Sean grunts]
51:04 I don't feel so good.
51:06 We should do this another day.
51:08 [grunting]
51:10 -You got this. -[Dustin] Lauren?
51:13 -[sighs] -Lauren!
51:15 [Lauren moans]
51:16 Something's up with Lauren.
51:17 [both grunting]
51:20 I can't do this anymore.
51:23 [Krystal moans]
51:25 [Carol] Oh, my God, I'm gonna throw up.
51:27 [Krystal] Please don't because then I will too.
51:30 Winners never quit, and quitters never win!
51:33 I don't wanna act anymore. I wanna go back to the room.
51:36 Let's shoot it quickly. You'll be proud when it's done.
51:39 Carol, can you stop gaslighting me?
51:40 Gaslighting? That is not gaslighting. You know what? Your generation sucks!
51:45 At least I'm not a baby boomer.
51:46 I'm not a baby boomer. I am Generation Y, thank you very much.
51:50 Ladies, this is no time for catfighting.
51:52 -[dramatic music playing] -[loud screeching]
51:57 I saw a photo of you at a Nirvana concert.
52:01 [scoffs] No, you didn't. That wasn't me.
52:03 It doesn't look like they're climbing.
52:05 Right, like, why don't they have ropes?
52:07 And would they let the little girl free climb a cliff like this?
52:11 Would she even know how to do it?
52:13 -I think she's unconscious. -I think Lauren seems fine.
52:17 Wake up, Lauren. Come on. Climb.
52:19 For your first time free climbing, you're doing a great job, guys!
52:22 Okay, guys, I really think I'm gonna throw up.
52:25 [Dustin] Maybe call the set medic?
52:27 I don't like it when people throw up.
52:29 Oh, God.
52:30 [vomits and groans]
52:32 Whoops.
52:36 -Should we bring them down? -Let's just see how it plays out.
52:39 Should we be concerned about this level of vomit? Just 'cause, you know
52:44 There's something going round.
52:45 -[Bola] It smells like ham or something. -Shh. It's okay.
52:48 I need touch-ups on hair and makeup, please!
52:51 -[stomach gurgling] -Can hair and makeup step in, please?
52:54 Hey, Lauren? Who would you say is the most fun person to act with?
52:57 Gavin, there's no time for recuperation.
53:00 You have to get the dinosaurs flying again.
53:02 -I'm not a magician. -I know you're not a fucking magician!
53:05 If you were, you could pull a movie out of your ass!
53:07 Oh, my God, it's Minnie Driver. [gasps] I love her.
53:10 You know, these are human beings. They're not machines.
53:13 Bucko, need I remind you, you used to be addicted to meth.
53:17 Once you stayed up for three weeks, did something bad, and I covered for you.
53:21 Okay, yes, I remember. Thank you for reminding me, Paula.
53:24 If I'd ever told anyone, you'd be in jail for the rest of your life.
53:28 Don't make me get tough. I don't like to get tough.
53:30 You do like being tough. You love it.
53:33 Can I put something into perspective for you?
53:35 We are one of two movies in production right now.
53:38 -It's us and Tom Cruise. -[Gavin] Yeah.
53:39 If we fail, a $50 billion corporation is going to go down.
53:45 People murder each other over ten grand.
53:47 What do you think they're gonna do over $50 billion?
53:51 You ass! [gasps]
53:53 Oh, dear.
53:55 Okay, so Mel Gibson is on the boat, and I think he thinks we're dating.
53:59 We did stuff last night. He's taking it too seriously.
54:02 What did you do?
54:03 Just over-the-pants stuff.
54:05 Guy, what's up?
54:07 Oh! Listen! I've got so many presents for you.
54:11 These people, they don't even care about what they have.
54:14 Yeah, I've got soap. I've got cream.
54:17 I've got You need a corkscrew? I'm gonna send you two corkscrews.
54:21 There's Bibles everywhere, in every room. They don't even read them!
54:24 I'm gonna send it to you so we can pray for them 'cause they're all going to hell.
54:29 -They're mistreating you. -Mmm.
54:32 Makes me furious.
54:35 You know what you need to do?
54:37 You need to lead a revolution.
54:40 Yes, revolution.
54:42 You're like little cogs in the machine. Don't you see it?
54:47 They've been using you!
54:49 You're going to burn down the machinery of corporate capitalism.
54:53 -Yes. -They are not the power.
54:56 You are the power! Only you can make the change!
55:00 It has to be me!
55:01 It has to be you.
55:04 We are working too many hours, and we are way over schedule.
55:07 It is unfair and unsafe.
55:09 Carol, why do you want us to bail? Just tell us why.
55:13 I'm not saying "bail." I'm saying "threaten to bail."
55:16 We're all gonna team up together, like the cast of Friends?
55:19 -No. -You want us to bribe them then?
55:21 -Not what I'm saying. -You want us to blackmail the studio.
55:24 What are you not hearing?
55:25 Every day, I eat the KitKat in the minibar,
55:28 and then I come back and there's a new KitKat.
55:32 I'm not giving this up.
55:33 I knew she was gonna do this. I knew you were gonna do this.
55:36 What did I tell everybody? Not to have her come back,
55:39 because you are a leaver, and you are trying to get us to be leavers too.
55:44 -I thought you forgave me. -Did I?
55:46 -You said you did. -Did I?
55:47 -Lauren! -I just hadn't seen you in a while.
55:50 Hey, little girl over there, why are you always here?
55:54 My dad's the stunt coordinator.
55:57 He doesn't love me, so
55:59 All right, uh, maybe we should vote on this.
56:02 Okay, let's do it. Who's in?
56:05 This is great! Let's go make our demands!
56:08 No, we're in to finish the movie.
56:10 That's not what I said! I said, "Are you in to be out of the movie?"
56:14 Then you should have said out!
56:16 No. I explained the plan, and then I said, "Are you in for the plan?"
56:20 Why would we listen to someone who doesn't know how voting works?
56:23 Guys, I am proud of you.
56:24 Do you understand that, together, we can do anything?
56:27 And I'm manifesting right now, for all of us, a classic!
56:32 -[Dustin] Yeah! -Yeah.
56:34 That's where it's at.
56:35 Hey, no, stop! This is not finished yet. You stole my meeting!
56:39 Cliff Beasts 6!
56:41 Whoo!
56:44 [quirky upbeat music playing]
56:51 Mr. Best, is all this necessary?
56:54 Maybe, maybe not.
56:56 This is a hotel, not a war zone.
56:58 My job's to look after these people, not imprison them.
57:00 You don't care about them. You just wanna get the job done!
57:04 Like a sergeant pretends to care about the soldiers before he sends them off
57:08 to die.
57:09 Now, let's finish this film and go home!
57:17 [Carol clears throat]
57:18 -Hey, Gavin? -Hi.
57:20 What's going on? All my lines are gone from the next scene.
57:22 Oh, that can't be true. She has lines in this, doesn't she?
57:26 Uh, only nonverbal lines.
57:29 But I'm supposed to emotionally connect with the baby cliff beast.
57:32 Oh, yes! That's right. The studio wanted Krystal to do that because she's young.
57:38 I'm young.
57:39 They thought she'd connect more with the baby beast.
57:41 -[Carol scoffs] Why? -Well, she's the baby.
57:44 And you're not now.
57:46 The studio know that you're overworked. And they heard you.
57:50 -What do you mean, "They heard me"? What? -They heard you.
57:54 [dramatic music playing]
58:03 [growls]
58:05 I got you now, you son of a bitch.
58:09 No.
58:10 Cole, put that goddamn gun down.
58:12 That baby dinosaur has just as much right to be on this planet as we do.
58:15 It's not about the planet.
58:17 It's about justice!
58:18 [Krystal] No, put it down!
58:19 God damn it, Vivian.
58:21 How can you be so naive?
58:24 These things are killers.
58:26 They killed Jarrar, and they killed your parents!
58:30 [gasps] They killed your parents dead.
58:32 Not all of them are beasts.
58:35 But maybe some of us are!
58:38 Vivian, what are you doing? Come here! Get back here now! Shit.
58:42 You're gonna wind up dead, like your momma!
58:45 [low growl]
58:48 [Krystal exhales]
58:51 -[growls] -Come here, little guy.
58:57 [growls]
59:03 [purrs]
59:04 [breathes heavily]
59:06 [sniffing]
59:08 [giggles]
59:10 He's just hungry.
59:11 It's like she's dino psychic.
59:14 You're safe now. No one's gonna hurt you.
59:17 If that thing moves, I'm gonna blow its fucking head off.
59:20 [captivating music playing]
59:25 Wow.
59:27 -Okay. -[baby cliff beast squeals]
59:30 [low growling]
59:33 [chuckles]
59:34 [whispering] He's learning
59:36 from her.
59:38 Okay, let's see if you can do these steps.
59:42 ["Started" by Iggy Azalea playing]
59:45 Very good. Very good.
59:59 [happy squeal]
1:00:01 [all chuckle]
1:00:09 Wow.
1:00:13 Looks like we're about to have us a hoedown.
1:00:16 [chuckles] All right, here we go.
1:00:19 Okay, get outta line, okay It's goin' down, okay
1:00:22 You know my temper Is way shorter than a Vine, okay
1:00:25 We not the same, lil' mama I don't wait in line, okay
1:00:28 You say you rich Well like Mufasa
1:00:30 [in ambiguous accent] Now I know
1:00:32 I must kill them all.
1:00:34 now I'm rich
1:00:35 I got in my bag And I ain't looked back since
1:00:38 [laughs] Whoa!
1:00:39 but fuck that shit
1:00:41 You started out hatin' Now you love my drip
1:00:43 I started from the bottom And now I'm rich
1:00:47 -[loud growling] -[all screaming]
1:00:50 [intense music playing]
1:00:52 [screaming]
1:00:53 [roars]
1:01:02 [Darren] And cut!
1:01:03 [bell ringing]
1:01:06 Really nice work.
1:01:09 Can you stop? You don't need to do that anymore.
1:01:12 Hey, you looked amazing!
1:01:14 Darren, this is such bullshit.
1:01:16 That was supposed to be my big scene, and now all I do is piss myself.
1:01:19 Urination is a very real and human reaction
1:01:22 to getting roared at by a cliff beast.
1:01:24 -It's humiliating! -I wouldn't worry about it.
1:01:26 We've got to serve the Cliff Beast nerds, the fans out there.
1:01:30 They want authenticity.
1:01:31 Krystal just did a fucking TikTok with a dinosaur. Is that authentic?
1:01:35 That dance is the clip they're gonna use in the Oscars.
1:01:38 -What? No, they're not. -Oh, believe me.
1:01:41 Gavin, we gotta shut down, buckle down, focus, and I will rewrite that script.
1:01:46 You give me two weeks, and I'll have it rocking.
1:01:49 [Gavin] Shut down for two weeks?
1:01:50 Yeah, like they did with Apocalypse Now. That's the model.
1:01:54 -What? -We are not shutting down for two weeks.
1:01:57 We told Rafi we'd be gone for three months.
1:01:59 It's been five and a half!
1:02:01 I didn't come all this way to not have it work out.
1:02:04 Rafi will understand when he sees how great the movie is.
1:02:07 None of these movies are great.
1:02:09 Hey, I am modeling for him the value of hard work
1:02:12 and perseverance and responsibility.
1:02:14 That is the best thing a father can do for a child.
1:02:16 No, the best thing a parent can do is be present.
1:02:20 I told you, my dad took him out to lunch at Nobu, and he seemed fine.
1:02:23 -You think he's fine? -Yeah.
1:02:25 He started a GoFundMe for a kidney transplant!
1:02:27 How much did he raise?
1:02:29 $79,000!
1:02:31 Kid's an entrepreneur.
1:02:32 He's only been a part of our family for 17 months!
1:02:35 I hate to say this,
1:02:36 but this franchise has been in my life a lot longer than Rafi has.
1:02:41 You are so screwed up.
1:02:43 I'm gonna make sure that you get put on some no-adoption list!
1:02:47 -Please, will you do that? -You'll never adopt again!
1:02:49 Oh, yeah? I'll adopt again.
1:02:51 I'll adopt half of South America if I want!
1:02:54 You know, Peru, Chile, Venezuela. Come on, you're living with me!
1:03:01 [Carol] What are you doing?
1:03:03 I'm packing.
1:03:05 You're leaving?
1:03:06 -Yeah, tomorrow we have a game. -Oh.
1:03:09 -Didn't I tell you? -No.
1:03:11 So what do we do now? I mean, can I get your email?
1:03:14 Of course.
1:03:16 Okay, what is it?
1:03:18 -Oh, you want it now? -Mm-hmm.
1:03:19 Oh, but I'm packing.
1:03:21 Okay, what is going on?
1:03:23 -What? -[Carol] I'm a bit confused.
1:03:24 I thought we had something serious.
1:03:26 Here's the thing. I'm married.
1:03:29 What?
1:03:30 I have five kids.
1:03:31 -You have five kids? -With three different women.
1:03:34 -With three different women? -I have three more coming.
1:03:37 With two other women.
1:03:38 Wow. Okay, so,
1:03:41 maybe I should call your wife.
1:03:43 Really? You'd do that?
1:03:45 Yes, you better believe it.
1:03:47 Oh, she will love it! She's a huge fan of yours.
1:03:50 Okay, I'm sorry, I just I don't know what's happening.
1:03:54 We have a very European relationship with my wife.
1:03:56 Okay, what does that mean?
1:03:57 That I'm allowed to have sex with you.
1:03:59 Oh, wow.
1:04:01 Okay, this is What?
1:04:03 No, don't be sad.
1:04:05 You had fun.
1:04:07 Now, I meant to ask you,
1:04:10 do you have PayPal?
1:04:11 Yes?
1:04:12 Because that KitKat and that water you had last night?
1:04:14 It cost £26.
1:04:17 [whimsical music playing]
1:04:19 [inhales deeply]
1:04:23 Anika
1:04:25 -You're working the night shift? -Yes, I do.
1:04:29 I see the way you look at me.
1:04:31 Yeah, I feel the same way, and I want you to know
1:04:35 I wanna rip your clothes off and have my way with you like an animal.
1:04:39 -That's amazing. -Yeah, it is.
1:04:41 -But-- -Hi.
1:04:45 Where are you guys going?
1:04:46 Um To help him plunge his toilet.
1:04:50 Huh.
1:04:51 I'll do it. I'll plunge his toilet.
1:04:54 Let me handle his toilet.
1:04:55 I would plunge the hell out of your toilet.
1:04:57 I would. Let me plunge your toilet.
1:04:59 I want to plunge this toilet!
1:05:01 I'm only trying to take care of you,
1:05:03 so you don't find yourself in the wrong toilet.
1:05:05 You're not in charge of which toilet I should plunge!
1:05:08 I'm just doing what's right for you and his toilet, which I will now plunge.
1:05:12 I will handle this toilet. I'm gonna clean your toilet.
1:05:15 Sir, let's go. Thank you, Anika.
1:05:19 Where are you?
1:05:21 [Josh] I'm in our bed.
1:05:22 It's so cozy and warm. Feels like home.
1:05:26 I can't wait till this movie's over. I miss being there with you sometimes.
1:05:30 I'm sorry this has been so hard.
1:05:32 Hey, what's going on?
1:05:34 [sighs] Carol's still not over it.
1:05:37 -Oh, poor girl. -Yeah, she's really struggling right now.
1:05:40 What? You can't just live in my house with your new girlfriend!
1:05:44 Hey, I'm house-sitting for you for free! Pump the brakes, Carol!
1:05:49 -Hey, what do you want from Postmates? -We did Chinese last night, right?
1:05:54 [Monica] Mm-hmm.
1:05:55 -I could do Thai? -I could do Thai.
1:05:57 Do not Postmates to my house! I'm coming home right now!
1:06:00 [yelling angrily]
1:06:02 [quirky music playing]
1:06:04 -What the fuck are you doing? -I'm locking the script.
1:06:08 You won't be needing these anymore. You know why? Because you're done!
1:06:12 Back away!
1:06:13 -Eddie Vedder gave me that guitar! -I don't care!
1:06:17 [groans]
1:06:19 [manic laughter]
1:06:23 -That doesn't bother me. -Oh, no?
1:06:25 My work is in the cloud.
1:06:26 Are you sure, SummerBoy1987? [manic laugh]
1:06:30 That's my cloud!
1:06:31 -It's not anymore! -[line ringing]
1:06:33 Rafi, look in the camera!
1:06:36 Look at Daddy's computer.
1:06:37 Mommy lit it on fire because Daddy's script is in the computer!
1:06:41 Daddy's trying to make a movie that's not a piece of shit,
1:06:44 like Mommy likes to make.
1:06:45 Your mom's a hack, Rafi!
1:06:47 I don't care.
1:06:49 I don't like movies. They're too long! Bye.
1:06:53 Well, this hack is gonna go home and take care of our little angel.
1:06:58 He's no angel.
1:07:00 You think the cat drowned itself?
1:07:02 Just so you know,
1:07:04 I know that this thing is never gonna happen again!
1:07:08 Ever!
1:07:10 ["Heart Of Glass" Miley Cyrus playing]
1:07:13 Rafi! Momma's coming home!
1:07:17 [screams]
1:07:18 Once I had a love and it was a gas
1:07:22 It soon turned out I had a heart of glass
1:07:25 [laughs, grunts]
1:07:26 Seemed like the real thing Only to find
1:07:31 Mucho mistrust Love's gone behind
1:07:33 [Lauren] Freedom!
1:07:35 [yells, laughs]
1:07:37 In between What I find is pleasing
1:07:41 [Carol screams]
1:07:43 Love is so confusing, there's no
1:07:46 [cheerful screaming]
1:07:47 If I fear I'm losing you, it's just
1:07:50 [gun cocks]
1:07:53 -[song stops] -[groans]
1:07:55 [screams] Oh, my God!
1:08:03 [Best] That's wonderful work.
1:08:06 [gasps]
1:08:11 -[screaming] -[song resumes]
1:08:14 That's my tennis hand, you motherfucker!
1:08:19 [gasps in fright] Gavin!
1:08:20 -He got my fingers! -You trying to escape too?
1:08:23 Of course not. I just heard a commotion.
1:08:25 Calm down. [grunts]
1:08:28 -[loud gasp] -What the hell's going on?
1:08:30 -What are you doing? Why did you hit him? -[screaming]
1:08:33 -Oh, what did you do to your hand? -You did this!
1:08:36 I will sort this. Go back inside.
1:08:40 -Did you fall in the gravel? -No! This is all your fault!
1:08:44 The therapist said not to blame. Don't blame me!
1:08:50 What the hell is going on here?
1:08:52 The security guards, they got confused.
1:08:54 They thought that Lauren was a deranged fan, and they shot her,
1:08:58 and she lost a few fingers.
1:09:00 She'll be fine. Just a few digits.
1:09:03 Just a graze.
1:09:04 [Lauren screaming in distance]
1:09:06 Nothing to worry about.
1:09:07 Gavin, you can't shoot the actors.
1:09:09 You can't even poison the fuckers these days. The press always finds out.
1:09:13 It wasn't my call to shoot them. Mr. Best reports to you.
1:09:17 -Mr. Best? Sorry, who's Mr. Best? -[elephant trumpets on screen]
1:09:21 I thought you sent him.
1:09:22 Mr. Best? I don't That does not ring a bell.
1:09:26 Sounds scary. Sounds like someone you wouldn't wanna fuck with.
1:09:30 Someone who'd do anything to make sure the movie got made.
1:09:33 Okay.
1:09:34 We need to shut down.
1:09:35 -We're not shutting the movie down. -We are shutting down the movie.
1:09:39 -We are not shutting down the movie. -[yells] We are shutting down the movie!
1:09:42 It's not like the world is desperate for another Cliff Beasts movie!
1:09:46 This isn't a vaccine!
1:09:48 This is a Cliff Beasts movie. There's five of them.
1:09:50 They're all the same!
1:09:54 Sorry, I was frozen there for a second,
1:09:56 but I assume you were agreeing with everything I was saying,
1:09:58 and I'm so glad because if you don't get the movie in the can,
1:10:02 I'll send one of these fucking elephants to trample your house and your children.
1:10:06 Okay? Hakuna matata, my sweet. [kisses]
1:10:09 -[line disconnects] -Wow.
1:10:12 I so wanna be her.
1:10:14 Hi, Tom.
1:10:16 I hate to tell you this,
1:10:17 but I don't think we have enough time or money to finish this Cliff Beasts--
1:10:21 Great, then just get it done and we'll be in touch.
1:10:23 I don't think it's possible to get it done.
1:10:26 Don't make an enemy of me, Paula. I will destroy you from within!
1:10:31 Okay, Tom. Thank you for this opportunity.
1:10:34 [line ringing]
1:10:36 [exhales sharply]
1:10:37 -Hello? -[Tom] Li.
1:10:39 The schedule's impossible with the budget we have.
1:10:42 Great. Then get it done and we will be in touch.
1:10:45 No, Li, you don't understand. This is impossible.
1:10:48 I have faith in you. You have never let me down before.
1:10:52 Wait.
1:10:54 Are you in Fiji?
1:10:56 -Yes, I'm in Fiji. -I'm down the beach!
1:10:59 I have not seen anyone in 37 days!
1:11:01 -You want to play tennis? -I would love to play tennis!
1:11:04 -Four o'clock? -Four o'clock!
1:11:06 Do you have balls? Oh, I have balls! [chuckles]
1:11:10 I spoke to Lauren this morning.
1:11:13 She loves you all, and she said the best thing that you could do for her
1:11:17 would be to make this movie great.
1:11:21 I spoke to her too, and she is not being cool about it.
1:11:24 She's really pissed at me like it's my fault.
1:11:26 I didn't shoot her fingers off.
1:11:28 Mr. Best's team thought that you were being attacked by a crazed stalker.
1:11:33 Were they able to reattach her fingers?
1:11:35 -They, uh, didn't find any of them. -[Darren gasps]
1:11:38 -All that's left is a thumb. -This is a blessing.
1:11:40 Lauren is gonna come back from this stronger.
1:11:43 There are a million things you can do with a thumb. It's not like it's a pinkie.
1:11:48 When will she shoot the rest of her scenes?
1:11:50 Well, we're not gonna shoot the rest of her scenes. Lauren is wrapped.
1:11:54 We've got some clever fixes I don't think anybody's gonna notice.
1:11:58 So are we allowed to leave?
1:11:59 We can't do that, unfortunately. You have to stay 'cause we have contracts.
1:12:03 It's called being an adult.
1:12:05 Fucking Jesus Christ.
1:12:07 [Gavin] Uh, one hiccup. Shouldn't be too much of a problem.
1:12:11 Our stunt coordinator, Steve, has had a bit of a virus scare,
1:12:14 so he is going to be joining us on Zoom today.
1:12:18 -Oh, it takes so long to shoot action. -Steve!
1:12:21 Hey, guys! Hope everybody's excited for today's stunt sequence.
1:12:25 Uh, Steve, looks like you lost some weight. [chuckles]
1:12:28 I'm the same weight as always.
1:12:31 All right, uh, let's go through the scene.
1:12:33 Okay, you know what? Let's run it. Just as we rehearsed, it's gonna be
1:12:36 [voice breaking] I froze. I'm frozen. Did I freeze?
1:12:39 Fucking bullshit! I told you it wouldn't work!
1:12:42 [voice breaking] Am I clear now? Am I coming in clear?
1:12:44 -Yeah. -Go ahead.
1:12:46 Here's how it goes. The action starts when Dustin engages the first iceman.
1:12:49 Typical hand-to-hand combat. Remember, parry, jab, end up with a naked choke.
1:12:53 Okay, take me over to the mound.
1:12:55 On the mound, Carol's gonna take out icemen four and five
1:12:58 with a series of explosions.
1:12:59 Dieter and Krystal, you're providing cover fire for the icemen,
1:13:02 [voice breaking] and, Sean, you're gonna walk--
1:13:05 Question. When I'm supposed to get to my mark, do I turn to my left?
1:13:09 Okay, first team, walking on! Let's do this!
1:13:13 -[dramatic music playing] -[yelling]
1:13:18 [both grunting]
1:13:22 [yelling]
1:13:24 Oh! [yelling]
1:13:27 -Whoo! -[gunshot]
1:13:31 [screaming]
1:13:33 Watch out! Watch out!
1:13:36 -[overlapping screams] -[groaning]
1:13:39 [chuckles] I'd see that movie!
1:13:41 I forgot to tell you that my dad sucks at stunts.
1:13:44 Sorry, think I grabbed the wrong wire. Let's do another one-- No!
1:13:47 [people exclaiming]
1:13:50 [man] Bloody hell.
1:13:51 I was checking my email real quick. How'd it go?
1:13:54 Um Not very well. We might have to
1:13:57 -Do another take, yeah. -[Sean groaning]
1:14:00 I want you to call the studio and tell them to fuck off!
1:14:03 Well, what happens then when I need to get a bigger trailer for Mark Ruffalo,
1:14:09 I ask 'em and they say, "You just told us to fuck off for Carol"?
1:14:12 -I can't do that, okay? -Do I have a hard out date on my contract?
1:14:16 -No. -So they could just make me work forever.
1:14:18 No, not forever. They're not monsters! They're just trying to make a good movie.
1:14:22 We're being mistreated!
1:14:24 Oh, spare me! You're being "actress-mistreated."
1:14:27 I'm being fucking human being-mistreated!
1:14:29 You ever try to teach a 12-year-old math? It's impossible, okay?
1:14:33 He's been shut up in his room.
1:14:35 I walked in there the other day, and he was watching Japanese taxi porn.
1:14:39 What is Japanese taxi porn?
1:14:41 Just what it sounds like.
1:14:42 They fuck the taxi driver halfway through the video, in Japan!
1:14:47 I need you to call the studio and tell them to stop mistreating us.
1:14:50 Otherwise, I'm out. I'm walking.
1:14:52 You walk off the film now,
1:14:54 you are financially responsible for any overages that you create.
1:14:58 What? What does that mean?
1:15:00 It means that if you leave the movie, you will owe them 114 million bucks.
1:15:04 I didn't know that was in there!
1:15:06 I didn't either. I didn't read your contract!
1:15:08 You're not being a good agent or a good friend.
1:15:11 I'm being a very good agent. And you know what? I'm not your friend.
1:15:15 It's something we pretend when there isn't a pandemic.
1:15:17 [phone rings]
1:15:18 -I gotta go. It's Mark Ruffalo. -Don't hang up--
1:15:21 Hey, Mark.
1:15:24 [yells]
1:15:26 [solemn music playing]
1:15:42 Oh, my God, you're in the pool.
1:15:44 How you doing?
1:15:45 I thought today was so good.
1:15:47 You did?
1:15:49 -Did you not? -No! Today was a disaster.
1:15:53 -What are you talking about? -Everyone got injured in the stunt!
1:15:56 I mean before the stunt. The scene that we did before was incredible.
1:16:00 That was genius, but everybody got really hurt.
1:16:03 Yeah, that was unfortunate for sure. I'm gonna talk to them tomorrow.
1:16:07 I just Honestly, I don't think I have anything left to give.
1:16:12 I'm so sorry about that.
1:16:14 I guess I was so focused on the dinosaurs, I forgot there are human beings involved.
1:16:18 Right.
1:16:20 Yeah. I'm gonna talk to Gavin. I'm gonna really change things so that you're happy.
1:16:25 I am mortified.
1:16:27 Really? That would be a lifesaver!
1:16:30 Carol, I'm really sorry.
1:16:40 [Darren] I'm gonna fix this.
1:16:42 [clears throat]
1:16:44 [both laughing]
1:16:45 -Hey. -Oh, my God!
1:16:47 -I'll race you. Come on! -Hey!
1:16:49 Come on. Try and catch me! [laughing]
1:16:52 Marco!
1:16:55 Hey, Darren. What's up here?
1:16:57 These are not my pages.
1:16:58 Yeah, um, we decided we're just We're not gonna shoot those.
1:17:02 They weren't good, so we're gonna go and shoot the original script,
1:17:07 also known as the real script that was approved by the studio.
1:17:10 Also known as the worst fucking draft!
1:17:13 Everybody agrees that my revisions are kicking ass.
1:17:15 They clarify our pro-environmental message.
1:17:18 People don't care about the environment.
1:17:20 People go to see the movies to see dinosaurs blow up and die.
1:17:24 Why? Because dinosaurs kill people. They're monsters!
1:17:28 We need a movie with heart. [hesitates] Ask Martha. Martha?
1:17:31 She's our audience.
1:17:33 Don't the dinosaurs need to live?
1:17:35 I don't care if dinosaurs die, you know? I thought they were dead.
1:17:40 Fine. I'll do your shit word-for-word.
1:17:43 That fucking scene we're about to shoot,
1:17:45 I don't know how I'll make it work, but I will 'cause that's what I do.
1:17:48 I turn shit into gold.
1:17:51 [Gunther] You're meant to slurp those ones back.
1:17:54 Hey, do you know, I heard that the movie is going really badly.
1:17:58 They're gonna extend for another three months. I can't be happier! [laughs]
1:18:02 The longer these shitbags stay in my hotel,
1:18:05 the bigger my house is gonna be when they leave.
1:18:07 I'm gonna have one of those toilets that shoots water up my ass,
1:18:11 heats it and dries it for me.
1:18:13 -Ronjon is not touching anything anymore. -[others cheering]
1:18:16 Plus, the more we stay here,
1:18:18 the more Dieter will realize that he doesn't need anything but me.
1:18:22 -Ooh! -[Anika] Yes.
1:18:23 -Cheers! Never stop filming! -[Gunther] Never stop filming!
1:18:26 Never stop filming!
1:18:27 [all] Go, Cliff Beasts It's your birthday
1:18:30 Go, Cliff Beasts It's your birthday
1:18:31 -♪ Hey! - Go, Cliff Beasts, it's your birthday
1:18:34 - Go, Cliff Beasts, it's your birthday -[Ronjon] Part one, part two
1:18:39 [Dustin] I'm here.
1:18:40 We're a family.
1:18:42 You've always been my hero.
1:18:43 I know that our love will get us through this nightmare.
1:18:49 [sentimental music playing]
1:18:56 [music swelling]
1:19:02 And cut!
1:19:03 -[bell ringing] -[Darren] Moving on. Excellent.
1:19:06 [sighs]
1:19:08 Great. That was I really felt that. That was powerful.
1:19:11 -Did I capture her physicality? -Yeah.
1:19:13 Yeah, you're fine. It's just you're six inches too tall.
1:19:17 -And you're not my wife. -Okay.
1:19:19 -She got her hand blown off, my wife. -I didn't
1:19:21 I didn't even go back to help her rehab. I had to finish this fucking movie.
1:19:25 -What asshole does that? -It's a specific situation--
1:19:27 -Am I an asshole? -No.
1:19:29 -The fuck am I doing? -I don't know.
1:19:32 I lost my wife and my adopted child of two years for this?
1:19:37 All this time I was producing this movie, I should have been producing my family!
1:19:41 -Are you a producer? -Uncredited, but everybody knows.
1:19:44 See that?
1:19:45 He's reacting like that because you made him feel something.
1:19:49 -Thank you. -So, well done.
1:19:50 What even was that?
1:19:51 That is called a "storm off." It's a pretty good one.
1:19:55 Got any good notes for that, Mr. Sundance?
1:19:58 This is the moment you chose to talk to me?
1:20:00 To come in here and heckle me? You?
1:20:03 We've got a saying about people like you in the business.
1:20:06 They talk about you. A sucky fucking worst actor.
1:20:11 You're a sellout. You're ruining everything.
1:20:13 You're making me look bad.
1:20:15 You're a poser!
1:20:17 Just kind of talking and mumbling. That's not acting!
1:20:22 I'm posing with my Oscar!
1:20:28 Carol!
1:20:29 -Hey! What are you mad about? -I have nothing to do in these scenes.
1:20:33 They keep trimming me and punishing me. You were gonna talk to the studio.
1:20:37 -I did. -And?
1:20:38 It didn't go well. I think it actually backfired.
1:20:40 You're the director! They'll give you whatever you want. They'll listen to you.
1:20:45 No, they will not!
1:20:46 They'll bring in Jon Favreau to finish it and send me home in a body bag.
1:20:49 I don't want to go to directors jail, okay?
1:20:51 -Is everything okay? -[Carol] No.
1:20:53 They cut my lines and won't let me leave. Nobody is looking out for me!
1:20:56 That is simply not true, Carol. I am your advocate. I'm your warrior.
1:21:00 If you could see how hard I work for you
1:21:03 behind the scenes, behind closed doors, on Zoom!
1:21:06 This is bullshit! You make us work when we're sick or injured.
1:21:09 That is not okay!
1:21:11 I'm sorry, if I might interject, I just got a call about your grandma.
1:21:15 -Okay, what? -She died.
1:21:17 What?
1:21:18 Yeah, she's dead. Um, in her sleep, so
1:21:21 -I'm so sorry. -[Pippa] I'm sorry as well.
1:21:23 Uh
1:21:25 -[Gavin] I'm so sorry. -Okay.
1:21:26 Uh, so I think I need to go be with my family right now.
1:21:31 That's just not gonna be possible, Carol.
1:21:34 Then make it possible.
1:21:35 You're not the only one suffering loss!
1:21:38 My dog got run over.
1:21:39 Did I burden everybody here with it? No. I grieved alone.
1:21:42 Mmm. I had to abandon my cat on the street just to shoot this movie.
1:21:46 I got a friend going through a really hard time, and I can't be there.
1:21:49 His movie didn't open and he's depressed.
1:21:52 -How old was your grandma? -She was 97.
1:21:55 Well, that's sad, but life has to go on. And the show has to go on.
1:21:59 You know what? You have become a monster!
1:22:03 [sighs]
1:22:06 -Oh, mask! -[Darren] Oh, shoot!
1:22:07 Yeah, I'm drinking, so
1:22:14 Dustin, don't be sad. The dailies look great!
1:22:20 [ringing on projector screen]
1:22:22 Hello, this is Paula from the studio,
1:22:24 and I just wanted to say thank you all for your tremendous sacrifice.
1:22:28 It is worth it.
1:22:30 Hey, Paula, who are you talking to?
1:22:33 Beck! Well, I'm talking to the cast of Cliff Beasts 6!
1:22:37 No way. Action movie? That's one of my favorite action movie franchises.
1:22:41 Really? Mine too! I hear they have some downtime.
1:22:43 Maybe you wanna play 'em some funky grooves.
1:22:47 Playing funky grooves is what I do best. Who's in the mood for a ladies' night?
1:22:51 I know I am. Ladies and gentlemen, Beck.
1:22:54 ["Ladies Night" playing]
1:22:56 [sighs wearily]
1:22:58 How's everybody feeling? You all look so sexy tonight!
1:23:02 The studio wanted to show their appreciation
1:23:04 by having me turn this motherfucker out!
1:23:09 Whoo! Thank you for fulfilling your contracts!
1:23:13 Only 37 more days of shooting And we got this one in the can!
1:23:17 Beck! Whoo!
1:23:18 Everybody get up out of your seats. Get up out of your seats! Come on!
1:23:24 Girls, y'all got the one
1:23:29 A night that's special everywhere
1:23:32 From New York
1:23:34 [yawns]
1:23:35 To Hollywood
1:23:37 It's ladies' night And, girl, the feeling's good
1:23:41 Oh, yes, it's ladies' night
1:23:43 And the feeling's right
1:23:45 Oh, yes, it's ladies' night
1:23:47 Oh, what a night
1:23:48 What a night!
1:23:49 Fuck it, let's dance!
1:23:51 And the feeling's right
1:23:54 Oh, yes, it's ladies' night Oh, what a night
1:23:58 Romantic cliff beasts
1:24:02 You have a T. rex
1:24:06 Sophisticated raptor
1:24:09 [groans] Son of a bitch!
1:24:13 Walk away!
1:24:14 Come play with me tonight, mama
1:24:16 This is your night tonight
1:24:18 Fuck this place! Whoo!
1:24:20 This is your night tonight
1:24:22 Everything's gonna be all right
1:24:24 This is your night tonight
1:24:26 Everything's gonna be all right
1:24:28 This is your night tonight
1:24:30 Everything's gonna be
1:24:31 [song ends]
1:24:33 [theme music playing]
1:24:35 I'm on set joined by the amazing cast of Cliff Beasts 6.
1:24:40 Carol, what's it been like
1:24:42 being back on set with all of your Cliff Beasts buddies?
1:24:45 It's great! I find myself smiling the whole time.
1:24:47 My face hurts from all the smiling.
1:24:49 -[laughing] -[fake laughing]
1:24:51 Now, we must take a moment to discuss the difficult times we're all in.
1:24:55 [Sean] Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
1:24:58 [interviewer] Do any of you have a thought about what we can do
1:25:00 to solve the problems that plague our world right now?
1:25:04 I have some good news for the world, and I think it might help a little bit.
1:25:09 Uh, the studio just decided that since we're doing such a great job,
1:25:13 we're gonna roll right into shooting Cliff Beasts 7.
1:25:17 -[Sean] Amazing! -What?
1:25:18 As soon as we complete 6!
1:25:20 What do you mean? I didn't sign up for Cliff Beasts 7!
1:25:23 -Oh, it's the same shoot. -No. I'm not doing that.
1:25:26 I am out. Not doing it! No.
1:25:28 Is this live?
1:25:29 Hello, can you hear me? Please help us, okay?
1:25:32 They are holding us against our will. I can't do another movie.
1:25:35 -I can't! It's not safe here, okay? -[switch clicks]
1:25:37 What the fuck happened to the lights? Can somebody turn those back on?
1:25:41 -What? -It's not live.
1:25:43 -[Carol] What? -It's not live.
1:25:46 -We're not live. -[Carol] Oh.
1:25:51 [Carol] Hey, Krystal's Kittens. You may not know me,
1:25:53 but I am a really close friend of Krystal's.
1:25:56 I know we are all struggling during this time,
1:25:58 but the Cliff Beasts cast is being held against its will, partially,
1:26:03 and forced to complete a film under very inhumane conditions.
1:26:07 Lauren Van Chance got her hand shot off,
1:26:09 and they are making us work through influenza!
1:26:12 So we need you to jump on Instagram, TikTok, Twitter, even LinkedIn,
1:26:17 and demand that they allow us to go home.
1:26:20 With full pay. And no repercussions.
1:26:23 Oh! That is perfect. Thank you so much, Krystal.
1:26:26 I'm so happy to help. I know how hard it's been for some of the older actors.
1:26:30 Yeah, it's been hard for them.
1:26:32 -You shouldn't post it. -What? Why?
1:26:34 Because you sound like whiny, spoiled actors.
1:26:37 I am not spoiled!
1:26:38 People don't wanna hear celebrities complain
1:26:41 about how hard their movie sets are.
1:26:43 They have real problems.
1:26:45 What are you talking about? These are real problems.
1:26:47 They're never gonna let us go home!
1:26:49 Hold on. If this is gonna make me look bad, I am not posting this.
1:26:54 I can't ruin my own brand.
1:26:55 It's not gonna hurt. You're the hero.
1:26:57 -It would make you look really bad. -[Carol] Whoa, uh
1:27:00 What did you just do?
1:27:02 I deleted it.
1:27:03 What? Why would you
1:27:05 [grunts] She is one of them! Not us!
1:27:08 She is not! She's my friend.
1:27:11 You sound like some crazy, rambling old actress. We're leaving.
1:27:15 I am the second youngest one!
1:27:17 Sorry.
1:27:19 Aah!
1:27:21 I deserved that.
1:27:23 You'll survive.
1:27:24 [Carol grunts]
1:27:27 Fuck you.
1:27:28 I'm sorry I hit you. I'm just having a really hard time right now.
1:27:34 -Hey, Sean. -You said you wanted to talk to me.
1:27:37 -Thank you for coming. Come in. -Sure.
1:27:39 I'm just having a bit of a hard time,
1:27:41 and I didn't know what to do or where to go.
1:27:45 -Um, Sean? -Yeah.
1:27:49 I always thought you guys were all fucking clowns.
1:27:52 I thought I was the only one who had it all together.
1:27:55 But Josh was right.
1:27:57 I'm the worst one of all of you.
1:27:59 -No! -Yes!
1:28:00 But you?
1:28:02 You're always so happy and positive all the time,
1:28:05 and I was just hoping that maybe you could help me because I'm falling apart here.
1:28:10 Carol.
1:28:11 Problems?
1:28:13 They're just lessons in disguise.
1:28:16 Remember that one step is the first There's You know
1:28:23 The first step in the thousand steps of your journey.
1:28:27 Okay.
1:28:33 Every day
1:28:34 every day is an opportunity for, uh
1:28:39 Uh, for you to
1:28:40 For what?
1:28:46 I don't have a fucking clue.
1:28:48 I don't know what I'm doing.
1:28:52 I'm a complete fraud.
1:28:53 -What? -I'm sorry.
1:28:55 The book is great. You should read the book.
1:28:58 But please understand, I didn't write it. Steve Harvey's ghostwriter wrote the book.
1:29:04 In fact, the only time [laughing]
1:29:07 The only time I ever read it
1:29:10 was when I was in the recording studio, making the audio book.
1:29:14 And I was bored. I was bored with the whole experience.
1:29:17 Okay? I'm sorry, but during the pandemic, I realized that we're all the same.
1:29:22 And I thought that I was special.
1:29:26 And, uh, you know, that's all I got.
1:29:30 But I'm not.
1:29:32 I'm not.
1:29:34 Oh, my God!
1:29:36 Krystal Kris, the most selfish TikTok superstar in the world,
1:29:42 snuck out of her movie's bubble, putting millions of people in danger!
1:29:46 The UK gives us Prince Harry, and what do we give them back?
1:29:50 The Krystal variant?
1:29:52 [crying] We need to do something. That was a really bad idea.
1:29:55 Number one priority right now is canceling Krystal Kris.
1:30:01 #CancelKrystalKris.
1:30:04 I just lost 3 million followers,
1:30:06 and if we don't get the fuck out of here, I'm gonna lose all of them.
1:30:11 I only have 200.
1:30:14 [screaming]
1:30:16 [upbeat psychedelic music playing]
1:30:20 There's no answers.
1:30:21 But there are drugs.
1:30:23 [inhales deeply]
1:30:25 Ah! Whoo!
1:30:34 [inhales sharply]
1:30:36 [Sean] Mmm.
1:30:37 Oh, that's good.
1:30:44 [inhales deeply]
1:30:48 Ooh!
1:30:54 [bones cracking]
1:30:55 The biggest mistake I made on this movie is not being on drugs the whole time.
1:31:00 There should just be a campaign. "Say yes to drugs."
1:31:03 I feel very embarrassed that I used to tell people not to do them.
1:31:06 People should do them. They're great!
1:31:08 Can I ask you guys a question?
1:31:10 Why can't I keep a man?
1:31:12 Oh, Jesus.
1:31:13 Okay, so my ex, Josh, he dumped me and left me for a fucking waitress.
1:31:18 When I was young, if you saw me,
1:31:20 you'd just wanna punch me in the fucking face
1:31:23 'cause I was that handsome. You just wanted to ruin it.
1:31:26 You know what? This business is so unfair to women, okay?
1:31:29 It is not fair. You have to stay young and be skinny,
1:31:32 but have big boobs at the same time.
1:31:34 It's impossible because nobody has that body type without surgery.
1:31:38 You can't be skinny and have big boobs at the same time!
1:31:40 It is physically impossible! It's impossible! [sniffles]
1:31:43 Yeah, but it's worth trying.
1:31:45 Gunther, why do you look like Benedict Cumberbatch right now?
1:31:48 I do?
1:31:49 Your inner spirit has come out and that's who you truly are.
1:31:52 Hello, I'm Doctor Strange.
1:31:54 [Carol] Oh, my God, I can't!
1:31:55 I don't like it. I want you to stop it.
1:31:58 Stop being Benedict Cumberbatch!
1:32:00 Everyone, do you think that I'm worthy of Anika's love?
1:32:04 I don't have an answer for that, bro.
1:32:07 She's 27, and she loves me.
1:32:10 And I
1:32:13 Love her.
1:32:15 Love her.
1:32:16 [Carol gasps]
1:32:17 Let's go wake up Krystal. Let's make a fucking TikTok.
1:32:20 -Yeah, let's TikTok. -Right now.
1:32:21 -Ooh! Yes! I love those things! -TikTok, TikTok. Tick, tick!
1:32:26 [laughs]
1:32:27 -["Sea Talk" by Zola Jesus playing] -♪ No, I can't give you what you need
1:32:32 All by myself
1:32:41 Do you wanna go?
1:32:45 Do you really know
1:32:49 I don't ever stay away for you
1:32:54 Oh, no
1:32:57 Do you want to go?
1:33:01 Do you really know that I can't
1:33:05 I can't afford you?
1:33:17 [Dieter wheezing]
1:33:21 Dieter? Oh, my God, Dieter!
1:33:23 Are you okay? Something's wrong with Dieter!
1:33:26 [Sean] Okay, wait. What's up? Dieter, wake up, man.
1:33:29 -All right, I'm gonna go get help. -Okay. Oh, my God, Dieter.
1:33:32 -[Sean grunts] -Oh, my God, what is happening?
1:33:34 He took a lot of drugs. I think he's having a bad reaction.
1:33:37 Okay, what we need to do is clear his airway.
1:33:40 Okay, how?
1:33:40 So I'm just expanding his cheek flesh at the moment.
1:33:44 -What is the purpose? -I've got his tongue.
1:33:46 So he's not gonna swallow his tongue. Your tongue is in good hands!
1:33:49 Dieter! Oh, fuck. What's going on?
1:33:52 -[Bola grunting] -God. What are you doing?
1:33:54 It's a heart attack! We need to attack it back.
1:33:57 -What? That is not true! -Heart attack!
1:33:59 -[Sean] Medical kit! -Oh. Can you get me the NARCAN?
1:34:02 -Yes. -Oh. I can't deal with this.
1:34:03 If he's taken opioids, this should dilute them.
1:34:06 [intense music playing]
1:34:08 There we go.
1:34:09 Come on, Dieter.
1:34:12 -Doesn't appear to be working. -Wait! He's allergic to peanuts.
1:34:15 -Oh! -Clear!
1:34:17 Come on, Dieter! Don't you die on me!
1:34:20 Get out of my way! Everybody back.
1:34:22 [speaking Hindi]
1:34:26 [in English] What language are you speaking?
1:34:28 When I get stressed, I speak Hindi. It's a better crisis language.
1:34:32 -We should shock him now. -Right, yeah.
1:34:34 Three
1:34:35 [both] Two, one, clear!
1:34:40 [Ronjon panting]
1:34:42 -[Sean sighs] -[Carol gasps]
1:34:44 What time is it?
1:34:45 3:23.
1:34:48 Okay. Time of death, 3:23.
1:34:51 -Time of death? Are we calling death? -Time of death?
1:34:54 It's over.
1:34:55 Okay, but what we're gonna do is we're gonna go to the bar,
1:34:59 and we're gonna raise a glass, okay, to what an incredible legacy he had.
1:35:04 He was a magician. A chameleon.
1:35:07 A reptile that could change colors.
1:35:09 His chest is still moving, Gunther!
1:35:11 He's not alive! Okay? That's just the body letting him go by moving a little bit.
1:35:17 That's what that is.
1:35:18 -They call it death breath. -I think he wants to come back to us.
1:35:21 [Gunther] Good night, sweet prince. Go to that beautiful light!
1:35:24 -[Sean] Do not go to the light. -You can go to the light.
1:35:27 -Don't go to the light. -You can go.
1:35:29 -Come back. -Go.
1:35:30 -Don't. -Hold on!
1:35:31 Don't let go. Hold on. Come back.
1:35:33 Oh, my God!
1:35:34 Wake up! Wake up!
1:35:36 Can you stop? Stop it!
1:35:38 It's heatstroke from the dancing! Let's get him on ice.
1:35:41 [gripping music playing]
1:35:44 I think we need more ice.
1:35:47 -At least the ice will preserve him. -We gotta get him out of here.
1:35:50 [all grunt]
1:35:51 -What else is in the bag? -[Gunther] Okay, oh, um
1:35:55 -[Sean] I just-- -Whoa. What happened?
1:35:57 Where the fuck did you come from?
1:35:58 -Oh, my God, was the dance that hard? -What's happening?
1:36:01 -[Sean] Yeah, on him. -[Carol] Dieter.
1:36:03 Oh, my God. Dieter!
1:36:05 -What is happening? -[Gunther] He just went down.
1:36:08 -What are we doing to save him? -We haven't tried this.
1:36:11 -Give it to me. -[Carol] Oh. She's just gonna do it.
1:36:14 -[all exclaiming] -Oh, my God! Anika!
1:36:16 -[gasps] -[others clamoring]
1:36:18 Oh, my God!
1:36:20 -I knew it was gonna work! -Yes!
1:36:22 -All right! -[Carol] Oh, my God!
1:36:24 [Sean laughing] Whoo!
1:36:26 [emotional music playing]
1:36:28 You saved me.
1:36:29 [Anika] Yes.
1:36:30 [breath trembling]
1:36:33 You are an angel.
1:36:35 Yes. I was trying to tell you.
1:36:40 You do love me?
1:36:42 I've loved you for a thousand years,
1:36:44 and I will love you for another thousand years.
1:36:49 Can someone take the needle out? It's a little too much.
1:36:52 [Bola] Yes, this is disgusting. Let me have this. Thank you!
1:36:56 [Carol] Oh, my God, guys.
1:36:57 Look around. Think about what just happened.
1:37:00 We worked together,
1:37:02 and together, we saved a life.
1:37:07 And we may fight it, and, oh, how we fight it,
1:37:10 but we are a family.
1:37:14 A Cliff Beasts family.
1:37:16 And that is just such a beautiful thing.
1:37:19 Listen to me. This is This is not even me acting.
1:37:22 No, we know. That felt real.
1:37:24 And we have to come together as a family and lead each other to freedom
1:37:29 because we are heroes.
1:37:31 I don't understand the metaphor. Are we heroes or family?
1:37:35 We're both! We are a family of heroes,
1:37:38 and we are going to save our family because we are the heroes and the family,
1:37:41 and that's what heroes do, is save their families.
1:37:45 So we're a family now.
1:37:46 No, that's just for the actors. They still think we're shit.
1:37:49 Thank you for being my family and for helping me through all of this.
1:37:52 I love you all from the bottom of my heart,
1:37:55 and I now see what I have to do and my reason for being here,
1:37:59 and it is to lead you all to freedom.
1:38:01 I don't understand. You're leading us to freedom. Where is freedom?
1:38:05 Freedom is the fuck out of here!
1:38:08 That's the cocaine talking right there.
1:38:11 -[dramatic music playing] -[growling]
1:38:14 -[thunderclap] -[growls]
1:38:18 [cliff beasts growling]
1:38:27 Can't they see we're trying to save them?
1:38:29 We can't save them if they're dead!
1:38:31 If they touch this wire, we can knock them out
1:38:34 and take them to an ice cave and figure out how to care for them.
1:38:37 Good idea, Vivian!
1:38:38 [music continues]
1:38:39 [screeching and growling]
1:38:47 [Dieter in ambiguous accent] I know a better way.
1:38:50 Let's put them to sleep,
1:38:53 permanently!
1:38:54 [actors exclaiming]
1:38:56 [Sean] He's a madman!
1:38:58 If we get them in the reproductive organs, their hormones are toxic and flammable.
1:39:02 Gio, you promised to honor and protect them!
1:39:06 Well, you silly little girl,
1:39:09 looks like Gio lied. [yells]
1:39:16 [Sean] No, stop!
1:39:18 Why, Gio, why? All for a luxury hotel?
1:39:22 The cliff beasts must burn!
1:39:25 And if all of you stand beside them,
1:39:27 then you will burn with them!
1:39:33 [cliff beast roaring]
1:39:35 -[groans] Cliff beasts! -[sobbing]
1:39:40 [Sean] Gio!
1:39:41 [Carol] Let's help him!
1:39:43 [Dieter] Save me! Aah!
1:39:46 -[Sean] No! -No!
1:39:48 [screaming]
1:39:53 I can't look! It's horrible!
1:39:56 I hate to admit it, but unfortunately, Gio just proved his own point.
1:40:01 What?
1:40:04 We have to kill them all.
1:40:08 [Carol] He's right.
1:40:12 Let's do this.
1:40:14 Light the sky on fire!
1:40:18 [heroic instrumental music playing]
1:40:20 Die, you feathered fucks!
1:40:29 Shoot their reproductive organs. They're flammable!
1:40:32 Go for the nuts!
1:40:34 [yells] Balls!
1:40:36 [screeches]
1:40:44 [cliff beast groaning]
1:40:46 Die, nature! Die!
1:40:50 Darren, I hate this rewrite. This is so stupid.
1:40:53 -Cut! -[bell ringing]
1:40:55 What? It looks great.
1:40:57 So the ending that you came up with
1:40:59 is me shooting at cock and balls with a flamethrower? That's what you got?
1:41:03 Dustin, you're misunderstanding what this is gonna look like.
1:41:06 It's not cock and balls.
1:41:08 These are reproductive organs.
1:41:10 It comes out of the dinosaur like a jellyfish,
1:41:13 and it just moves towards the camera.
1:41:15 And the little tentacles, and it's fluorescent,
1:41:19 and it goes back into the body. It looks beautiful!
1:41:22 The people from Paddington made it.
1:41:24 [Dustin] Why would I shoot at a gelatinous,
1:41:26 pulsing dinosaur dick and balls like that?
1:41:28 That sounds like you're attacking some kind of defenseless thing.
1:41:31 You're the hero! You have to kill them. Otherwise they'll take over the world!
1:41:36 Why don't we just shoot 'em in the asshole?
1:41:38 [Darren] It's not even a dick. It's a metaphor for the virus.
1:41:43 Martha, does it look beautiful?
1:41:44 Uh, well, personally, I find it a bit troubling,
1:41:47 but, um, it doesn't look like a dick.
1:41:49 It doesn't look like a dick.
1:41:51 Not any dick that I've seen.
1:41:53 You think that makes it okay?
1:41:55 That their dick and balls look like a jellyfish?
1:41:57 Can we be brought down whilst you chat? To have a little cigarette break?
1:42:01 Hey, how you doing?
1:42:03 [dramatic music playing]
1:42:05 You know what, Dustin?
1:42:07 [amplified] I'm in charge of this movie.
1:42:09 You're gonna do what I tell you to do. Sorry, everybody.
1:42:15 I am the painter, and you are the paint!
1:42:18 I think this is gonna really work. I think this is really fun.
1:42:22 Who the fuck is that?
1:42:23 Don't insult my mocap men!
1:42:25 You know what, guys? As soon as we wrap, I'm gonna punch you both in the jaw.
1:42:29 Well, I'm gonna write you a stern bloody email.
1:42:31 Guys! The sooner we get everybody Where's the cast?
1:42:35 Where's the fucking cast?
1:42:36 Gavin! Where is everybody?
1:42:38 I don't know.
1:42:39 [amplified] First team, we need you on set. We are not done shooting.
1:42:42 First fucking team!
1:42:43 Come on, guys! We're losing time!
1:42:46 Where's Dustin?
1:42:47 God damn it!
1:42:48 Dustin, you're wanted back on set. Soon as you can make it, that'd be great.
1:42:52 Fucking prick!
1:42:54 Mr. Best, there's been a breach.
1:42:56 [dramatic music playing]
1:42:58 [exhaling sharply]
1:43:05 [grunting]
1:43:11 I believe the children wanna play!
1:43:13 Okay, let's have some fun.
1:43:16 [hesitates] Can I leave?
1:43:17 No! I'm sorry I'm not Patty Jenkins.
1:43:20 I don't get to work with fucking Cal Gadot.
1:43:22 Gotta work with these fucks!
1:43:24 There's some really crazy shit going down on the Cliff Beasts set right now.
1:43:28 I don't even know where to begin.
1:43:30 It's been really hard on set these days--
1:43:33 [groans]
1:43:38 Hey! What's happening? Has something gone wrong?
1:43:41 Get out of my way.
1:43:42 -Is there something we can do-- -To cheer them up?
1:43:45 Cheer them up? This'll cheer them up!
1:43:47 -This'll cheer them up! -Whoa!
1:43:48 -This'll cheer them up! -Aah!
1:43:50 What are you doing? Crikey!
1:43:51 -Do you want cheering up? -No, I'm--
1:43:53 Do you want cheering up?
1:43:54 I'm on a different film.
1:43:59 -That slowed them down a bit. -Three, four seconds. Yeah.
1:44:02 What the hell was that?
1:44:04 I'm stopping you. You have a movie to finish.
1:44:07 I thought you were my friend.
1:44:09 I was paid to be your friend!
1:44:12 They paid you?
1:44:14 -I'm a mole! -What are you talking about?
1:44:16 And by the way, you are a mediocre dancer.
1:44:20 That's my appeal, bitch!
1:44:23 [groans]
1:44:25 Aah! [groans]
1:44:30 Come on.
1:44:34 Hey. Hey, stop. Hey!
1:44:36 Hey, why are you running?
1:44:40 Hey!
1:44:41 -Hey, stop! -Why are you chasing me?
1:44:44 -Why are you running? -Get the hell away from me!
1:44:47 [screaming]
1:44:49 [both grunting]
1:44:51 [grunting]
1:44:53 [Carol] God, get off of me!
1:44:55 [both panting]
1:44:58 -Why were you running? -Why do you care if I'm running?
1:45:00 You could have stolen something.
1:45:02 I didn't steal anything.
1:45:04 I really don't think you're allowed to run during a pandemic.
1:45:07 I have to because it is an emergency.
1:45:09 Ow! [groans]
1:45:10 Great. I have a sore leg, and what do I have to do for the rest of my day? Run.
1:45:14 Aw! Somebody get Professor X his wheelchair!
1:45:17 I play a lot of different characters. Not just him!
1:45:22 -You're -Carol Cobb.
1:45:23 -Carol Cobb. -We went on a date, remember?
1:45:27 Oh, wow.
1:45:28 You don't remember--
1:45:29 Oh. Hey, hi.
1:45:33 -They need me back on set. -Nobody's calling you. That's not a phone.
1:45:37 ["Git Go" by Katastrophy Wife playing]
1:45:40 Never thought I had to take it
1:45:43 Never felt the need to fake it
1:45:47 Never felt the need To try all the shit you pull
1:45:52 [grunts]
1:45:54 I never had your git-go
1:45:58 I had you figured from the get-go
1:46:01 [choking]
1:46:06 [song ends]
1:46:09 [sighs] There's my phone.
1:46:11 [dramatic music playing]
1:46:13 Got you now, you dirty hippie.
1:46:16 [screams]
1:46:19 [amplified] Hey, get your ass off the set! What are you, crazy?
1:46:24 [gasps, spits]
1:46:26 [dramatic music playing]
1:46:33 Mr. Best!
1:46:35 What? What is it, Gavin?
1:46:37 What now?
1:46:39 Cliff Beasts!
1:46:41 Shit, it's in his hand!
1:46:42 [screaming]
1:46:45 Can I be in Cliff Beasts 7 now I shot him for you?
1:46:47 I'll make a call.
1:46:48 Thank you. Sorry about flipping out earlier.
1:46:50 -There's a lot of stress and emotions. -Just let me enjoy this moment.
1:46:54 [Best groaning]
1:46:55 [dramatic music playing]
1:47:11 -Do you know how to fly that thing? -Yeah, I took eight lessons.
1:47:15 [Darren] Hey! Where do you think you're going? Huh?
1:47:18 [beeping]
1:47:21 Don't move!
1:47:22 Stay there!
1:47:24 How do the brakes work on this thing? God damn it.
1:47:26 No one's getting in that helicopter!
1:47:29 Turn around.
1:47:31 Turn around, go back to set.
1:47:33 I won Sundance with a movie I made on my phone!
1:47:38 An iPhone 6!
1:47:39 I am not going back to my old life.
1:47:41 You think I want to go back to Home Depot, selling tiles?
1:47:45 This is my shot!
1:47:46 Your call time is right now!
1:47:48 I got this.
1:47:50 -You got what? This? -You wanna go, Cimino?
1:47:54 -Do I wanna go? Yeah. -Come on.
1:47:56 Come on.
1:47:57 You wanna play around? Is that what you want?
1:48:00 [both grunting]
1:48:04 [Carol] Yeah.
1:48:05 [Sean muttering]
1:48:07 What are they doing?
1:48:09 I'm pretty sure it's the tribesmen fight from the movie.
1:48:12 -Oh. This is a terrible fight. -[Dustin] Go again?
1:48:15 -All right. -From the top?
1:48:17 Grab. Block away, one punch, second punch. Down, stomach. Duck.
1:48:22 The fight I was just in was way better than this.
1:48:25 [Carol] Oh.
1:48:25 Attaboy.
1:48:27 -Give me that! -Yeah!
1:48:29 Should we stop it?
1:48:31 Probably not. No one's getting hurt.
1:48:33 [both grunting]
1:48:36 Shit! Dustin, just do something different! Anything!
1:48:39 All right. Here's a page one rewrite.
1:48:42 On your balls!
1:48:43 -[Darren groans] -There it is!
1:48:45 -[laughs boisterously] -[Darren groans]
1:48:47 -Yeah! That's different. -Hit to the face!
1:48:51 [cheering]
1:48:53 Yeah!
1:48:56 -Attaboy, Dustin! -Let's go.
1:48:58 [dramatic music playing]
1:49:01 -[groans] -[Sean] Dieter!
1:49:02 Dieter, come on!
1:49:05 You should have gone with my pages.
1:49:08 [Sean grunts]
1:49:09 All right, now this
1:49:11 That's done. Okay, all right, this goes
1:49:14 [Carol] Oh, my God.
1:49:17 My cast! [groans]
1:49:21 [Dieter] Anika,
1:49:23 you made it okay!
1:49:24 I got in here three hours early just to be safe.
1:49:27 [romantic music playing]
1:49:30 I wanna live with you. I wanna live with you in Beverly Hills.
1:49:34 -I live in Sherman Oaks. -Even better!
1:49:36 [music swelling]
1:49:39 -You got this? -Yeah.
1:49:40 -Whoo! -No celebrating yet.
1:49:42 -Okay, no, we-- -[Dustin] Fly it.
1:49:44 [dramatic music playing]
1:49:52 Oh, man, this is a rush!
1:49:55 All right!
1:49:57 Yes!
1:50:01 Whoo! Whoo!
1:50:08 Why are we standing still?
1:50:10 What are you doing?
1:50:12 -[hesitates] Just hold on-- -[Dustin] Let's get going.
1:50:14 Okay, just give me a second. Um
1:50:17 Okay, what is that one?
1:50:19 I've not seen that button. I do not know what that does.
1:50:22 [Darren] What happens now?
1:50:24 You're definitely gonna get the sack for getting Howie to shoot Mr. Best.
1:50:27 You'll be in directors jail for the rest of your life, if that. You're finished.
1:50:31 And I'm just gonna take over as producer and get the movie in the can.
1:50:35 [music continues]
1:50:37 What are you doing?
1:50:39 Uh, I only know how to go up and down.
1:50:41 What?
1:50:43 For the movie, they only taught me how to go up and down.
1:50:46 They didn't teach me how to go forward.
1:50:49 I don't know how to move forward, okay?
1:50:51 I'm just, uh I don't know what else to do.
1:50:55 Just push it forward!
1:50:56 Well, I don't know if that's how it works. It might be how it works. I don't know!
1:51:01 -Oh, my God. -What is happening?
1:51:03 Krystal, go on YouTube. See if there's a helicopter tutorial or something!
1:51:07 Does YouTube still exist?
1:51:09 -Yes! -Yes, YouTube exists!
1:51:10 -It still exists! -Okay!
1:51:13 -Um -Hurry, Krystal.
1:51:14 -[amusing music plays] -[chuckles]
1:51:17 What? What are you looking at?
1:51:20 [Krystal] It's a monkey being washed in a sink.
1:51:24 -[Dustin] It's taking a bath. -[Sean] What's happening?
1:51:27 -It's a monkey. -A monkey taking a bath?
1:51:29 -Look, he's so cute! -Let me see.
1:51:31 I don't think he likes it!
1:51:33 -Aw! His fur is so soapy! -[alarm beeping]
1:51:36 -[all screaming] -[intense music playing]
1:51:38 -Stop this! -Stop!
1:51:40 [all screaming]
1:51:42 [Sean] Krystal, show me!
1:51:43 Hurry! Let's go!
1:51:45 Stop yelling at me! Go, just watch it!
1:51:47 Today, I'd like to talk to you about how to fly a helicopter.
1:51:50 Why don't we hop in and I'll show you how it works?
1:51:57 -What are you doing? -Oh.
1:51:59 It's a prop. It doesn't work.
1:52:00 I just thought maybe this could scare them into coming back.
1:52:03 [mouthing]
1:52:07 -Okay, I think I got it. -Darren is pointing a gun at us right now!
1:52:11 -[Carol] Oh, my God! We gotta go. Go! -[Sean] Okay. Uh-huh.
1:52:21 Sean, I believe in you.
1:52:24 You can do this.
1:52:26 I wanna be the hero, but I can't do it.
1:52:29 Come on, guys, we're a family!
1:52:32 [valiant music playing]
1:52:34 Let's do this together.
1:52:38 [Dustin] Come on.
1:52:40 All right. Okay, guys, here we go.
1:52:45 We're doing it. We're doing it. We're moving forward.
1:52:48 [triumphant music playing]
1:52:50 [all screaming]
1:52:52 No, we're good! We're good! We're good! We're good!
1:52:55 We're good. I've got it. Okay.
1:52:59 So how are you doing? This seems like a major setback.
1:53:02 We're gonna be fine! We'll put a cut together. It's gonna be great.
1:53:06 We're not done. They'll probably come back!
1:53:13 I think I got it, everyone.
1:53:16 We're going home.
1:53:19 [Bola] You sons of bitches, you didn't tip us!
1:53:22 -[Carol] Oh, my God! -Bye-bye, Clifton!
1:53:24 -Bye! -Whoo-hoo!
1:53:25 [triumphant music continues]
1:53:45 [theme music playing]
1:53:51 -[electropop music playing] -[people cheering]
1:53:58 I'm Susan Howard, reporting live
1:53:59 from the premiere of a documentary about a disastrous production
1:54:03 that the entire nation is talking about.
1:54:06 I'm a beast!
1:54:07 [both] We're a beast!
1:54:08 [all] I'm a beast!
1:54:10 -[both] I'm a beast! -I ain't a fucking cliff beast.
1:54:12 -Let's get ready to bubble! -Bubble!
1:54:15 [both growling]
1:54:18 [Dustin] Cliff Beasts 6?
1:54:20 Holy shit.
1:54:21 [orchestral music playing]
1:54:23 When Howie cracked, that's when we all should have just gotten out of there.
1:54:29 And here's a warning. Do not leak this on the Internet, you fucking idiots.
1:54:34 -[Krystal] The security was insane. -[yelling]
1:54:36 They had guns.
1:54:38 [gunshot]
1:54:39 It felt like America, but in England.
1:54:42 [screaming]
1:54:44 The second these things go to streamers, they're gonna be watched on televisions,
1:54:48 and then that makes me a television star.
1:54:50 I'm not a television star! I am a movie star!
1:54:53 What do you think I am? Young Sheldon?
1:54:56 -No, don't leave me! -Let go!
1:55:00 Not now. Turn that off, you tit!
1:55:03 Yeah, the cast all called me EPK Guy.
1:55:06 It's like, "That's not my name. My name is Scott."
1:55:09 Now they know it. It's on the fucking poster.
1:55:13 How does it feel to be the villain of Beasts of the Bubble?
1:55:16 [chuckling] I'm not the villain. What are you talking about?
1:55:19 Why are you complaining? I can't leave and have almost no lines.
1:55:22 I'm over here with my dick in my hands like a piece-of-shit extra!
1:55:25 No, I didn't know that all my Zoom calls were being recorded.
1:55:28 [laughing]
1:55:30 I could sue, but I won't 'cause I'm in on the joke,
1:55:32 and I love the joke.
1:55:33 So you're the mole!
1:55:35 [chuckling] I know! I'm the mole.
1:55:37 I never thought it could work as just a hand.
1:55:39 [laughing]
1:55:40 High five.
1:55:42 See?
1:55:43 [Sean yells]
1:55:45 Sean, how are you doing?
1:55:47 I heard you just got out of rehab for cocaine addiction.
1:55:50 Yes, two-day rehab. I walked in one day. I said, "I think I'm addicted to cocaine."
1:55:54 They said, "You shouldn't do that anymore." I said, "Done."
1:55:57 -Two days, huh? -48 hours.
1:55:59 What's your next project, Darren?
1:56:01 I'm doing the Skittles movie.
1:56:03 It's based on the candy. It's got a great story. A passion project.
1:56:06 And it's about racism and diversity, and how we can all get along.
1:56:12 It's all the flavors, but it all goes under one name. Skittles.
1:56:15 So much exciting news for the two of you. And who's this?
1:56:19 This is our friend, Kate.
1:56:21 I have no idea why I'm here.
1:56:24 Come on, Kate.
1:56:26 Come on.
1:56:28 I'm a beast!
1:56:29 -Come on, Rafi, just say it with me. -No, get off me!
1:56:33 So how have you been doing since the movie?
1:56:36 Um, yeah, good.
1:56:37 Um, so I'm worried I'm gonna get in trouble
1:56:39 because I didn't send the swabs off to get tested.
1:56:42 Um, so I've still got most of them at home.
1:56:45 And even now I don't really know where to send them. If you know?
1:56:49 No? Thank you.
1:56:51 [upbeat music playing]
1:57:00 Do you think they have enough footage in the can to put a cut together?
1:57:04 We didn't get any of the opening,
1:57:05 but maybe that doesn't matter as long as the ending's strong.
1:57:08 Yeah. The rest of the movie can be shit as long as the ending's good
1:57:12 'cause that's what they'll remember. You know?
1:57:14 Oh, yeah.
1:57:16 Well, at least we tried to make a movie.
1:57:19 They can't judge us for that.
1:57:20 We made something that's a distraction in these difficult times.
1:57:23 [helicopter whirring]
1:57:26 ["Wings Of Stone" by Adam Levine playing]
1:57:32 When I was a baby, down about
1:57:34 Sweet brave boy above the clouds
1:57:37 The world was mine, whoa
1:57:41 The clouds, they call me to fly
1:57:43 The mountains echo with my cry
1:57:46 You were never welcome here, whoa
1:57:49 With your silly woe And your football toe
1:57:54 Your technology
1:57:56 You took my bone in paradise away
1:58:00 I'm coming back Never gonna let you rise again
1:58:05 I'm coming home The end is near, my friend
1:58:09 I'm coming back Never gonna push me down again
1:58:14 Flying up on my wings of stone
1:58:18 On my wings
1:58:21 Of stone
1:58:25 -♪ On my wings of stone -♪ I'm coming home
1:58:33 Thunder and lightning was my friend
1:58:36 Thought the glory days would never end
1:58:38 But you always wanted more, whoa
1:58:43 The sun didn't shine its light on me
1:58:45 From the mountains to the sea
1:58:48 Through volcanoes I will soar, whoa
1:58:51 With your power lines
1:58:54 And your diamond mines
1:58:56 You took everything
1:58:58 Now my whole entire world is gone
1:59:02 I'm coming back Never gonna let you rise again
1:59:07 I'm coming home The end is near, my friend
1:59:11 I'm coming back Never gonna push me down again
1:59:16 Flying up on my wings of stone
1:59:20 On my wings
1:59:23 Of stone
1:59:27 -♪ On my wings of stone -♪ I'm coming
1:59:29 On my wings
1:59:32 Of stone
1:59:36 -♪ On my wings of stone -♪ I'm coming home
1:59:40 Your blood is hot You make mistakes
1:59:45 My blood is cold Like the Arctic lakes
1:59:49 My brain is small
1:59:52 You think it's funny, don't you?
1:59:55 The birds are all that's left of me
1:59:58 I'd rather be a bird than a monkey
2:00:01 I'm coming back Never gonna let you rise again
2:00:06 I'm coming home The end is near, my friend
2:00:11 I'm coming back Never gonna push me down again
2:00:15 Flying up on my wings of stone
2:00:19 On my wings
2:00:22 Of stone
2:00:28 I'm coming
2:00:29 On my wings
2:00:32 Of stone
2:00:37 I'm coming
2:00:38 On my wings of stone
2:00:44 My wings of stone
2:00:47 I'm coming
2:00:48 On my wings
2:00:51 Of stone
2:00:56 I'm coming home
2:01:09 ["Carmen Suite No. 2: II. Habanera" by Bizet playing]
2:03:57 It's really hard to direct in these things.